Everyone knows the fact that we control life exclusively ourselves. And everything that we have achieved, and that you will receive in this life, is completely our merit. Another conclusion follows from this: all the negativity that surrounds us occurred only through our fault and because of our decisions or actions. However, despite our knowledge, it takes us a very long time to realize that we have the ability to change everything. Therefore, in this article we intend to tell and convince you that changing your life for the better is very real, no matter how scary and impossible it may seem.
5 simple steps to change your life and yourself
Our team of authors of the online magazine site believes that there are five main steps to radically change yourself and your life. It is with these steps that you should start if you decide to make changes in your life.In addition, we would like to warn you about the difficulties that you will most likely have to face: they will not understand you, they will advise you to do everything differently, they will probably try to stop you, and most importantly, you yourself will not particularly oppose this, since you will have little faith into the reality of possible better changes. Therefore, before you change your life, believe in yourself, your strength, and most importantly, in the final success!
So, the steps to a better life:
- Build an imaginary better future and make a detailed plan to bring it to fruition. Every change starts with a dream. Each of you should have your own dream, or rather a goal for which you will live, work and change yourself. The dream should be so strong that for the sake of it you can wake up early in the morning and get to work, for the sake of it you will not stop after failures. Try to describe in detail your future better life: what and how it will take place every day. For example, describe to yourself what clothes you will wear, what house you will live in, and what kind of person will be next to you. After you have a goal, try to come up with a step-by-step plan or tasks that you need to complete on pieces of paper and write in detail on pieces of paper. For example, we have a dream to live in Canada. To do this, we draw up a rough plan: to study options for emigration to Canada, collect the necessary documents and raise money. Then you begin to implement each of the points. This is how they change their lives for the better.
- Touch real change. You cannot change your life for the better by changing some little thing in it, such as buying a professional camera or going to the sea. The goal should be more global and relate to most of your life. For example, you can change your job, place of residence, attitude to life, etc. In addition, your desires must be real, and not the desire to learn how to fly in the air.
- Change your social circle. In many ways, the changes will depend on the circle of your communication, if the people around you support, help and in every possible way contribute to your improvements, then everything will work out. If others envy, escalate the situation, not believe in you and say all sorts of nasty things about you, then, of course, no changes will occur. We can tell you right away that in 95% of cases the social circle will have to be changed in any case, because if you are unhappy now, then this is partly the fault of the people around you too. They can be direct culprits in this, and indirect, for example, be indifferent to your life situation. Therefore, start communicating with successful people, kind and those who believe in your potential changes. It’s better for other people not to talk about their plans at all, just stop contacting them and that’s it ...
- Find the strength in yourself to rise after the falls. Of course, in building a successful and happy future, there will be constant problems and failures. In these difficult moments, you should never give up or give up. You need to “get up off your knees” and continue to go ahead into your best life. Be prepared for such difficulties. Look for support among people close to you. Be bolder and more persistent, because you still need to achieve your happiness, no matter what it takes.
- Start acting right now! Do you know what is the best moment to start your changes?! RIGHT NOW!!! Do you want to change yourself and your life?! Then immediately begin to change, do not wait for the right moment, it may never be, but this does not mean that you need to sit and wait for it. The faster you "start", the faster you will come to the goal - to your better life.
Hello dear Friends! I am often asked: “Anna, you are engaged in self-development, you are constantly doing something... And where should I start changing my life?” Of course, I often answer this question in different ways, based on the individual qualities of the interlocutor. There are many approaches. In this article you will find a list of the main 16 points. From what point you start, in fact, is not so important.
What matters is your Intention to Act! Do not think, do not plan, but ACT!
Brief history
Is there a chance for a greenhouse rose to grow in the wild and not break? Most likely, a tender plant will have to acquire good thorns, learn to survive in conditions of a minimum of water and heat, otherwise death threatens. Well, if the flower, in addition to everything else, begins to scold itself for the “not such” color of the petals, not enough wonderful aroma or too thin stems, nothing good will come of it at all.
Do you get the gist of the analogy? A person without an inner core (or self-confidence) is the same rose that in real life will have to fight for its existence, having grown sharp teeth. Only the strongest can win, who is not afraid to take risks, to show himself true, who is ready to take responsibility for his life and goals.
Complexes and internal indecision give rise to fear, making a person vulnerable. That is why you need to develop self-confidence. And below we will tell you how to do it right and where to start changing your life!
How to develop self-confidence or how to start changing your life: 16 useful tips
1. We work on external manifestations of uncertainty
We change the image
Take a close look at your image in the mirror and think about what you have long wanted to change, but did not dare? Are you happy with your hair and clothing style? A well-chosen image will not only emphasize the dignity of the figure, but will create miracles of self-perception.
Don't try to change your style yourself. It's not very effective! Seek help from stylists or friends with good taste.
Learning to speak beautifully
What separates self-confident people from notorious losers? The manner of speech.
Hard? Sign up for a speaking class.
Keep your posture straight
When a person slouches, he non-verbally sends signals to the environment that are not in his favor.
Keep your back straight, you will be surprised how much this will affect your well-being and mood!
2. Change behavioral habits
Turn on activity mode
Instead of sitting in 4 walls and eating low self-esteem with a bucket of ice cream, isn't it better to work on yourself?
Sports, travel, acquiring new skills and creative dedication give a great reason to be proud, filling life with meaning.
Making new acquaintances
The wider the circle of contacts, the more influence and strength we have, we can get support for our ideas and opportunities in time.
It is important to learn how to make contacts, build a positive conversation and not be afraid to open up when meeting.
You will find some tips on how to make new acquaintances in our article.
We are engaged in self-education
A good strategy for strengthening your inner self is continuous development. Strength is not only in the muscles, but also in the practical application of knowledge that can be gleaned from books, scientific journals or advanced training courses.
Mastering public speaking skills
A good workout for developing self-confidence will be speaking in front of a large number of people - at meetings, lectures, presentations, etc.
Don't be afraid to be the first to speak, ask clarifying questions, or act as a spokesperson for your team.
Helping the weak
A wonderful way to increase self-esteem is kindness and mutual assistance. Don't be afraid to lend a helping hand to those who are weaker.
The generosity of the soul is the real power! Helping those in need, we feel that we are worth something in this life, which means that we do not live in vain.
3. Mastering the basics of goal setting
We define goals and life principles
If a person does not have principles, it is easy to use him, after all, he himself does not know by what criteria to evaluate himself. Decide why you came into this world? What do you live for, what kind of people do you want to see next to you?
We focus on solutions
Instead of whining about how bad everything around is, and how many problems have piled up, it is better to refocus energy on solving the problem. Not "life is bad" or "I'm lazy", but "how to make life more interesting" and "where to get the energy to fight."
Approaching dreams realistically
You can set yourself an unattainable ideal and immediately give up, losing all desire to fight. Or you can draw real goals and slowly implement your plans, each time congratulating yourself on a new victory. The second option has a positive effect on your self-esteem.
Learning to praise ourselves
Do not wait for recognition of merits from the outside, the most important critic is yourself. It's time to learn not only to scold yourself for laziness and failures, but also to praise yourself for your achievements. Celebrate another victory with a trip to a restaurant or a vacation trip, you deserve it.
4. Set the right inner mood
Rediscovering ourselves
To defeat internal complexes and strengthen weaknesses, you need to get to know yourself! Start keeping a diary of your thoughts and feelings. Analyze everything that happens to you during the day, look for the roots of fears in the distant past. This will help you understand how to change behavior for the better, become more confident and take a fresh look at the events of life.
Cultivating a personality
Limiting beliefs, stereotyped thinking, living by social stereotypes - all this only strengthens low self-esteem. Stop following the herd, it's time to discover your true self, learn to think independently and act without regard to the opinion of the majority. It makes no sense to try to please everyone, you are unique!
Mastering meditation practices
How good is meditation? It helps to relax and find a state of harmony. The noise of the city blocks the true desires of the soul, the vanity around does not allow us to know ourselves, to figure out where we are moving and what we want. Meditation helps to gain inner knowledge, confidence in your path.
We work with thinking
By changing the way we think, we can change our lives. It is very important not to forget to learn to look at the positive aspects of your actions, to find the bright side in negative things. After all, what we focus on is what we get!
Do not be afraid to change the rules of the game, grow and discover the world anew - this will help you become more confident in yourself, rewriting the book of your life in a new way.
That's all! All the best to you!
How to change yourself? If you are asking this question, it means that you are already a very mature person. People are more likely to ask the question of how to change other people or circumstances.
Only an adult and reasonable person understands that any changes in life begin with changes in oneself.
It is truly fortunate to understand that managing the circumstances of your life begins with changing yourself.
How to start changing
We set goals
Changing yourself is a worthy decision. But where to start? Before you change yourself, you need to understand exactly what goals you are striving for. What do you want to see as a result of your changes? After all, you can spend a lot of effort, and then be dissatisfied with the result.
The goals that may require changes are very different, for example:
- Make an amazing career.
- To start a family.
- Find health and beauty.
- Achieve a high position in society.
- Create sources of passive income.
But it must be borne in mind that in order to achieve a particular goal, certain qualities will be required:
- For example, the qualities needed to create a family for a woman: kindness, tenderness, desire to take care of children, meekness, obedience, fidelity, devotion. And if a girl sets herself the goal of creating a family, then it will be beneficial for her to change and develop precisely these qualities.
- If the goal is to build a career, other qualities will be needed, such as determination, assertiveness, determination, strength.
- Of course, you can develop all the qualities in yourself a little bit with an indefinite goal. But with this approach, attempts to change are likely to quickly come to a standstill. Since actions in the absence of a goal do not bring much satisfaction, therefore it is lost to move on.
Therefore, it is very important, before you start to change, to set a goal. Just “I want to change” is not enough to transform yourself. Change starts with choosing a goal. This is the answer to the question: “Where to start transforming yourself?”
Finding role models
The next step in changing yourself is to find people who have already achieved similar goals.
Knowing the end point you want to get to, you can try to find your own path. But we must understand that such a search takes a long time and very often leads to nothing. Sometimes it's like trying to invent your own script and language.
It is much easier to study the examples of the development of those people who were in a similar situation and were able to change it. It is very important that they be able to overcome it successfully. It is desirable to take an example not one or two.
- BIOGRAPHIES OF SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE
What can be taken as an example? An excellent option - biographies. , in one area or another, sometimes they write books about how they overcame difficulties, how they changed.
Reading biographical books helps to identify personality traits that contributed to the achievement of intended goals through change. Choose books whose authors can confidently say: "I changed myself completely and got decent results."
- PEOPLE AROUND YOU
Sometimes examples can be seen in life. For example, a friend who did not have a personal life for a long time, but then she changed herself and found family happiness.
Or a colleague who at first held a minor position, but then. Watch people succeed in getting what they want. Point out their qualities, feel free to ask for advice.
- LECTURES, TRAININGS
Listening to lectures and attending trainings is also a good option to meet the right people. Sometimes the leader of such trainings is a successful person who is ready to share his experience on how to change. And in the past has gone through great changes.
- PSYCHOLOGICAL LITERATURE
Reading helps you change yourself. However, not all books will be useful.
Therefore, study the reviews and try to learn as much as possible about the life of the author. Not all authors of psychological literature deserve to be an example of how to change.
- RELIGION
If faith is not unacceptable to you, then you can read or listen to lectures of clergymen. Among them are often people who have the knowledge of how to change completely and are good role models.
Learning from someone else's experience
The next step in self-improvement will be to study the experiences of people who have been able to change the course of their lives. By studying their experience, you can systematize it and understand how to change in order to become like them and achieve goals.
Read books, attend trainings, study biographies, collect as much information as possible from other people's experiences on how to change yourself.
Do not rush into the pool with your head. At first, some things may not be understood. That is, there will be no understanding of why this or that thing needs to be done, how to apply it and why it is needed. Do not write off, gradually introduce into your life what is close and understandable.
- For example, if you decide to become a person leading, then starting it right away on Monday, by Tuesday of the next week there is a big chance to quit it.
- Why? Because with the advent of the thought “I want to change,” a person rushes to change everything at once. That is, a newly minted follower of a healthy lifestyle begins to get up at 6 in the morning, do exercises, eat vegetables and fruits, instead of the usual dumplings, quit smoking and skip drinking alcohol at the next birthday.
- As a result, after a few days or weeks, this lifestyle becomes unbearable. The person returns to his old habits. Question: How to change? now he cares much less, there is a feeling of disgust for the changes.
- Studying someone else's experience, join it gradually, with understanding. If you are going to get up early, get up 30 minutes earlier tomorrow. Three or four days later for another 10 minutes. Gradually bring the rise time to the desired. It should become a habit, not a violence against oneself. And before doing something, it is very important to understand why you need it.
Where to look for support and how to stay motivated
When deciding how to change yourself, it is very important to remember that motivation and a strong desire to change are essential companions of progress.
Naturally, the desire to change will rise and fall over time. Sooner or later, the first fuse will pass, motivation will begin to decrease. There will definitely be situations on the path of change when it seems that there is no progress.
There will be situations when it seems that the changes are going completely in the wrong direction, that they do not bring you closer to your goals. Sometimes there may be a strong desire to give up everything and return to what it was.
But remember to say the phrase: "I changed myself completely, I succeeded!" only those who nevertheless reached the end, those who coped with all the difficulties, experienced difficult moments and those who did not give up, can do it.
To cope with difficult situations that arise along the path of change, create conditions for yourself that help you not to quit what you started. What are these conditions?
The right attitude to failure
There will undoubtedly be successes and failures in the process of change. It's important to deal with failure the right way. You don't have to beat yourself up for every mistake.
Failure is good too. Because it provides food for thought and analysis. It helps you understand your mistakes and not make them in the future.
If you are not mistaken, then you most likely do not study. Each miss is fraught with an equal or even greater opportunity. Learn to see opportunities and lessons in failure.
Environment for change
Without a good environment that shares your goals, it will be impossible to change. There are no people who never have doubts. There are very few people who can resist the pressure of others for a long time. In order to survive periods of doubt, rejection of society, it is necessary to have the support of like-minded people.
It doesn't have to be many, but there should be at least one. Since it is the support of someone who shares your aspirations and beliefs that can change everything.
Change progress tracking
- Motivation is lost due to the inability to feel progress. The solution in this case will be - a diary or any other way of fixing the current state.
- Go back from time to time to old records about yourself to see that changes are still taking place.
Possible obstacles
Often a person who declares: “I want to change” and starts moving in this direction is perceived by others with hostility.
Do not worry, with the question: "How to change if others do not support me?" each one that decides to go its own way, to change and develop, faces.
Environment that hinders change
For example, someone in the company has stopped drinking and is no longer drinking alcohol. Usually such statements cause a strong reaction. Because you can't just stop drinking. This requires a very good reason, for example, illness or pregnancy. Otherwise it is impossible.
People around you are usually afraid of change, they do not share your desire to change. Perhaps, if you stick to your path and achieve good results, over time these same people will ask themselves how to change themselves.
But for now, they will most likely react negatively or warily.
Personality traits that prevent change
In addition to people, character traits such as laziness, fear, and indecision hinder changes. Old favorite habits also slow down progress:
- For example, a person takes care of his health, masters healthy nutrition, physical exercises. But then laziness and old habits begin their attack. Eat delicious in the evening, skip a workout.
- Drive such desires away. Create conditions in which bad habits and character traits will be difficult to manifest. Then, over time, you will happily say, “I have completely changed myself.”
You know, Joel, the magic's gone.
What we are going to do?
Enjoy the moment.
("Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind", 2004)
To increase their productivity and level of satisfaction with life, improve their financial and social situation, they often use such a method as compiling lists of tasks that need to be completed. However, why not organize a similar list, but from the actions that prevent you from changing your life for the better?! And literally every day.
A little funny, sure, but trust me, it's an incredibly useful tool for keeping track of the bad habits that are hindering your productivity. There are at least 7 things you must stop doing every day if you want positive change in your life path.
1. Live someone else's life
Dr. House will somehow live without you. And the "Interns" will not notice your absence if you suddenly stop watching them. Even the personal lives of politicians or show business stars mean nothing compared to your own life.
What really matters is your significant other, friends, children, siblings, relatives, business partners, employees and customers. Give them enough time and attention. They deserve it.
When meeting strangers, be polite; however, don't try to become best friends with everyone. Relish communication and stay focused on the people who matter to you - those who make your life bright and rich.
2. Think about the future instead of living in the present
What happens here and now will never happen again. Take care of your time, it's your life. Work on something, but don't forget to enjoy your travels. Every step you take matters. Don't get caught up in the vicious cycle of false productivity when you think about anything and everything in your head instead of doing it "here and now."
Sometimes it is very difficult to appreciate the importance of the current moment until it becomes part of your memory. But in the end, you will realize that the tiny moments of life from the present are much more valuable than those that you dream about. So learn to appreciate what you have now before time forces you to appreciate what you once had.
3. Postpone decisions
Sometimes doing something takes much less time and effort than deciding to do it.
Life pain is full of difficult decisions. There are many forks on the path of life, all the paths of which look equally tempting. And the most important thing is not which path you choose, but the very fact of choosing this path.
Here's the deal: I've been at zero a few times, come back to life a few times, I've done it over and over again. I started new careers. The people who knew me then don't know me now. Etc.
I started my career from scratch several times. Sometimes - because my interests changed. Sometimes - because all the bridges were burned without a trace, and sometimes because I desperately needed money. And sometimes it was because I hated everyone at my previous job or they hated me.
There are other ways to reinvent yourself, so take my words with a grain of salt. This is what worked in my case. I've seen it work for about a hundred other people. From interviews, from letters that have been written to me over the past 20 years. You can try - or not.
1. Change never ends
Every day you rediscover yourself. You are always on the move. But every day you decide where exactly you are moving: forward or backward.
2. Start with a clean slate
All your past labels are just vanity. Have you been a doctor? An Ivy League graduate? Owned millions? Did you have a family? Nobody cares. You have lost everything. You are zero. Don't try to say that you are more than that.
3. You need a mentor
Otherwise, you will go under. Someone has to show you how to move and breathe. But don't worry about looking for a mentor (see below).
4. Three types of mentors
Straight. Someone who is ahead of you, who will show you how he got it. What does "this" mean? Wait. By the way, the mentors don't look like Jackie Chan's character in The Karate Kid. Most mentors will hate you.
Indirect. Books. Films. You can get 90% of the instructions from books and other materials. 200-500 books equate to a good mentor. When people ask me, “What is a good book to read?” - I do not know what to answer them. There are 200-500 good books worth reading. I would turn to inspirational books. Whatever you believe in, strengthen your beliefs with daily reading.
Anything can be a mentor. If you are nobody and want to re-create yourself, everything you look at can become a metaphor for your desires and goals. The tree you see, with its roots out of sight and the groundwater that feeds it, is a metaphor for programming if you tie the dots together. And everything you look at will "connect the dots".
5. Don't Worry If Nothing Excites You
You care about your health. Start with it. Take small steps. You don't need passion to succeed. Do your job with love, and success will become a natural symptom.
6. Time it takes to reinvent yourself: five years
Here is a description of those five years.
Year 1: You wallow and read everything and just start doing something.
Year 2: You know who you need to talk to and keep working with. You do something every day. You finally understand what the map of your own game of Monopoly looks like.
Third year: You are good enough to start making money. But so far, perhaps not enough to earn a living.
Fourth year: You provide for yourself well.
Year 5: You make a fortune.
Sometimes I got frustrated in the first four years. I asked myself, "Why hasn't this happened yet?" - He beat his fist on the wall and broke his arm. It's okay, just keep going. Or stop and choose a new field of activity. It does not matter. Someday you will die, and then it will be really difficult to change.
7. If you do it too fast or too slow, then something is wrong.
A good example is Google.
8. It's not about the money
But money is a good measure. When people say, "It's not about the money," they need to be sure they have some other unit of measure. "How about just doing what you love?" There will be many days ahead when you don't like what you do. If you are doing it out of pure love, it will take much more than five years. Happiness is just a positive reaction from your brain. Some days you will be unhappy. Your brain is just a tool, it does not define who you are.
9. When can you say, "I'm doing X"? When does X become your new profession?
10. When can I start doing X?
Today. If you want to paint, buy a canvas and paints today, start buying 500 books one by one and paint pictures. If you want to write, do the following three things:
Read
If you want to start your own business, start coming up with an idea for a business. Rebuilding yourself starts today. Every day.
11. When will I earn money?
In a year, you will put 5,000-7,000 hours into this business. That's good enough to put you in the top 200-300 in the world in any major. Getting into the top 200 almost always provides a livelihood. By the third year, you will understand how to make money. By the fourth - you will be able to increase turnover and provide for yourself. Some stop there.
12. By the fifth year, you will be in the top 30-50, so you can make a fortune.
13. How to determine what is mine?
Any area in which you are able to read 500 books. Go to the bookstore and find her. If you get bored after three months, go back to the bookstore. Getting rid of illusions is normal, this is the meaning of defeat. Success is better than failure, but the most important lessons come from failure. Very important: do not rush. During your interesting life, you can change yourself many times. And fail many times. It's fun too. These attempts will turn your life into a story book, not a textbook. Some people want their life to be a textbook. Mine is a story book, good or bad. Therefore, changes occur every day.
14. The decisions you make today will be in your biography tomorrow.
Make interesting decisions and you will have an interesting biography.
15. The decisions you make today will become part of your biology.
16. What if I like something exotic? Biblical archeology or 11th century wars?
Repeat the above steps and by the fifth year you will be rich. We don't know how. There is no need to look for the end of the path when you are only taking the first steps.
17. What if my family wants me to become an accountant?
How many years of your life did you promise to give to your family? Ten? All life? Then wait for the next life. You choose.
Choose freedom, not family. Freedom, not prejudice. Freedom, not government. Freedom, not the satisfaction of other people's requests. Then you will satisfy yours.
18. My mentor wants me to follow his path.
This is fine. Learn his way. Then do it your way. Sincerely.
Luckily no one puts a gun to your head. Then you would have to comply with his demands until he lowers the gun.
19. My husband (wife) is worried: who will take care of our children?
A person who changes himself always finds free time. Part of changing yourself is finding moments and reshaping them the way you would like to use them.
20. What if my friends think I'm crazy?
What are these friends?
21. What if I want to be an astronaut?
It's not about changing yourself. This is a specific profession. If you like space, there are many professions. Richard Branson wanted to be an astronaut and created Virgin Galactic.
22. What if I enjoy drinking and hanging out with friends?
Read this post again in a year.
23. And if I'm busy? Am I cheating on my spouse or betraying my partner?
Read this post again in two or three years, when you are broke, out of work, and everyone will turn their backs on you.
24. What if I can't do anything at all?
Read point 2 again.
25. What if I don't have a diploma or it's useless?
Read point 2 again.
26. What if I need to focus on paying off a mortgage or other loan?
Read point 19 again.
27. Why do I always feel like an outsider?
Albert Einstein was an outsider. No one in authority would have hired him. Everyone feels like an impostor sometimes. The greatest creativity is born out of skepticism.
28. I can't read 500 books. Name one book to read for inspiration
Then you can immediately give up.
29. What if I'm too sick to change myself?
The change will boost the production of beneficial substances in your body: serotonin, dopamine, oxytocin. Move forward, and you may not get well at all, but you will get healthier. Don't use health as an excuse.
Finally, rebuild your health first. Sleep more. Eat better. Go in for sports. These are the key steps to change.
30. What if my partner set me up and I'm still suing him?
Drop the lawsuit and never think about him again. Half the problem was you.
31. And if they put me in jail?
Wonderful. Re-read point 2. Read more books in prison.
32. And if I'm a timid person?
Make weakness your strength. Introverts are better at listening and concentrating, they know how to arouse sympathy.
33. What if I can't wait five years?
If you plan to stay alive in five years, you can start today.
34. How to make contacts?
Build concentric circles. You must be in the middle. The next circle is friends and family. Then there are online communities. Then - people whom you know from informal meetings and tea parties. Then - conference participants and opinion leaders in their field. Then there are mentors. Then - customers and those who make money. Start making your way through these circles.
35. What if my ego gets in the way of what I do?
After six months or a year, you will return to point 2.
36. What if I am passionate about two things at once? And I can't choose?
Combine them and you will be the best in the world for this combination.
37. What if I'm so passionate that I want to teach others what I'm learning myself?
Read lectures on YouTube. Start with a one-person audience and see if it grows.
38. What if I want to earn money in my sleep?
In the fourth year, start outsourcing what you do.
39. How to find mentors and experts?
Once you have accumulated enough knowledge (after 100-200 books), write 10 ideas for 20 different potential mentors.
None of them will answer you. Write 10 more ideas for 20 new mentors. Repeat this every week.
40. What if I can't come up with ideas?
Then practice it. The mental muscles tend to atrophy. They need to be trained.
It will be difficult for me to reach my toes if I don't exercise every day. I have to do this exercise every day for some time before this posture comes easily to me. Don't expect good ideas from day one.
42. What if I do everything you say, but it still doesn't seem to work?
It will turn out. Just wait. Keep changing yourself every day.
Don't try to find the end of the path. You can't see it in the fog. But you can see the next step, and you will understand that if you take it, you will eventually reach the end of the path.
43. What if I start feeling down?
Sit in silence for an hour a day. You need to get back to your core.
If you think this sounds stupid, don't do it. Move on with your depression.
44. And if there is no time to sit in silence?
Then sit in silence for two hours a day. This is not meditation. You just have to sit.
45. And if I get scared?
Sleep 8-9 hours a night and never gossip. Sleep is the first secret to good health. Not the only one, but the first. Some people write to me that four hours of sleep is enough for them, or that in their country those who sleep a lot are considered lazy. These people will fail and die young.
When it comes to gossip, our brains are biologically programmed to have 150 friends. And when you hang out with one of your friends, you can gossip about one of the other 150 friends. And if you don't have 150 friends, then the brain will want to read gossip magazines until it looks like it has 150 friends.
Don't be as stupid as your brain.
46. And if everything seems to me that I will never succeed?
Practice gratitude for 10 minutes a day. Don't suppress your fear. Notice your anger.
But also allow yourself to be grateful for what you have. Anger never inspires, but gratitude never inspires. Gratitude is the bridge between your world and the parallel universe where all creative ideas live.
47. And if I constantly have to deal with some kind of personal squabbles?
Find other people to be around.
A person who changes himself will constantly meet people who try to suppress him. The brain is afraid of change - it can be unsafe. Biologically, the brain wants you to be safe, and change is a risk. So your brain will give you people trying to stop you.
Learn to say no.
48. What if I'm happy at my office job?
49. Why should I trust you? You've failed so many times
Don't trust me.
50. Will you be my mentor?
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