When I was a little younger, I had grandiose goals and aspirations, and a strong desire to achieve them every day of my life. In those days, my greatest desire was to live each day with dignity and peace of mind—to be calm and peacefully move from one task to another with concentration and calm, restrained energy.
Everything seems to be simple? Probably no. But there are steps we can take to at least stay calm more often. Why be calm? Damn it, because it's a fantastic feeling! Anger and impatience wear down our hearts, our souls, and our families. When we control our emotions, we get more done, communicate better, and live more productive and purposeful lives.
Below are twelve tips on how to keep your cool and remain calm in various life situations.
1. Try not to be dramatic
It is very easy to dramatize and make an elephant out of a fly. In any stressful situations where the problem concerns you, resist the urge to exaggerate the negative. Avoid the words "always" and "when". You may feel like Stuart Smalley, but telling yourself “I can handle it,” “It’s okay,” and “I’m stronger than this” can really help you look at the problem in a different way.
Don't talk, blog, or tweet about your problem. Don't discuss it with your friends right away; digest it yourself first, this will give you time to calm down a bit. Sometimes, well-meaning friends are too sympathetic to you. By doing this, they only add fuel to the fire, and you are even more upset.
3. Discover metaphors and visualization as a way to stay calm
Here's what helps me: I try to represent the problem as a node. The more I panic and pull on the ends, the tighter the knot tightens. But when I concentrate fully, I calm down and can loosen one thread at a time.
It also helps if you visualize yourself acting with restraint and focus. Stop screaming and move as slowly as possible. Speak slowly and quietly. Become that calm and unflappable person that you see in your imagination.
Here's another technique: Do you know any person who can be called unflappable? Think about what this person would do in your place.
4. Identify the factors that drive you crazy
Are there certain situations that make you lose control? Identify specific factors, from the time of day, to how busy (or bored) you are, to your blood sugar levels. Do you lose your temper when it's too noisy - or too quiet? Knowing your personal irritants will help you stay calm throughout the day.
5. Realize that you can control your emotions
Recall times when you were able to successfully remain calm in a difficult situation. Perhaps it was when you wanted to yell at your spouse or children, but then the doorbell rang, and you were able to instantly reorganize. Remember that you can repeat this knowing what irritates you and what can help you maintain peace of mind.
6.Create a calm environment with relaxing rituals
If calm music comforts you, use it. If silence calms you, use it. Maybe you put on soothing instrumental music, dim the lights, and light scented candles.
When you get home from work, take a few minutes to calm your mind before diving into family chores. Sit in the car for a couple of minutes and take a few deep breaths. Kick off your shoes and drink a few sips of water. Such rituals are extremely calming during the transition from one activity to another.
7. Take care of your basic needs
Make sure you get enough sleep and get enough protein, fiber, vitamins and minerals. Most often, I get irritated when my blood sugar is low. However, it is enough to eat something nutritious, and I feel (relatively) lighter.
Also try to exercise. Daily exercise helps relieve physical tension, and this in turn helps you control your feelings. If I feel the need, then instead of a half-hour run, I do kickboxing. It helps.
Avoid excessive consumption of sugar and caffeine, and do not dehydrate the body. Drink a large glass of water and see if you feel better, more calm and attentive.
8. Pay Attention to the Soul and Spirit
Depending on your religious preferences, meditate or pray. Practice yoga - or just sit quietly for a while. The ability to find peace of mind will serve you well more than once. Take a meditation class and learn techniques to help control your busy mind.
9. Get distracted
Instead of thinking about the same things, do something interesting, exciting, or creative. Try to laugh (or laugh at yourself). Watch a comedy or read a blog that always makes you laugh. When you are animated, it is much easier to remain calm.
10. Take a day off
If I resist like crazy not to take a day off, I know for sure - I need it. If I can get over myself and spend a whole day away from work, I always return there calmer, more confident and filled with fresh ideas.
11. Don't forget to breathe
When my children were very young, we helped them calm down by teaching them to breathe with their belly. It still works, both for them and for me. Diaphragm breathing helps relieve tension immediately, and it gives you a couple of minutes to calm down. This is often enough time to assess the situation and regain a sense of control.
During proper belly breathing, your belly will literally rise and fall. To practice, put your hand on your stomach. Inhale through your nose and see if your hand goes up as you inhale. Hold your breath for a few counts and exhale slowly.
12. Consider quotes that can help calm your mind.
Here are a few quotes that I find inspiring:
“You are heaven. Everything else is just the weather.” Pema Chodron
"A calm, focused mind, not directed to harm others, is stronger than any physical force in the universe" Wayne Dyer (Wayne Dyer).
“It is useless to rush life. If I'm living on the run, then I'm living wrong. My habit of haste will not lead to anything good. The art of living is to learn how to make time for everything. If I sacrifice my life for haste, it will become impossible. Ultimately, procrastination means taking the time to think. It means taking time to think. Slowly you will be in time everywhere " Carlos Petrini (Carlos Petrini) - the founder of the movement "slow food".
“The single most important reason to stay calm is that calm parents hear more. Restrained, receptive parents are those whose children keep talking.” Mary Pipher
“Keep calm, serenity, always control yourself. Then you will understand how easy it is to be in harmony with yourself.” Paramahansa Yogananda
How to keep a person calm in any situation, if excessive emotionality leads to undesirable consequences? Often it is difficult for an individual to cope with anger, hatred, aggression on his own, and he does not know what to do with these feelings. Staying calm in stressful situations will be easier if a person realizes for himself the need to control his own emotions. With "hot" you can say and do things that a person often later often regrets. In addition, if an individual in a critical situation succumbs to anxiety that overcomes him, then his ability to think logically, make rational decisions is lost, and the ability to act correctly sharply weakens.
At the first stage of learning to gain calmness, psychologists recommend learning to remain calm in minor situations when the individual is not yet fully possessed by negative emotions, and then move on to train and learn in more serious and significant disputes or conflicts.
Often people notice behind themselves that it is very difficult to maintain inner peace when every trifle is important in life and therefore circumstances easily unsettle. But if you develop a somewhat philosophical view of things, you can learn to remain calm in any situation.
How to always keep calm? Psychologists advise working on your own. If a person believes in his own strength, then he gains the conviction that he will cope with any situation that can happen in his life. And vice versa, if he doubts himself and sets himself up for an unfavorable outcome of any undertaking, then it is difficult for him to deal with life circumstances and at the same time not be nervous.
Keeping calm in stressful situations will be possible if a person gets rid of the bad habit of dramatizing events that happen to him and forbids himself to wind himself up.
An individual who wants to learn how to remain calm needs to direct his wild fantasy in a more productive direction, and not mentally scroll through unfavorable scenarios in his head, since such an attitude will only add anxiety and worry. If a person feels that he is giving in to panic, then you should stop and think logically, what is the reason for this condition.
Psychologists strongly advise you to monitor your thoughts, because often a person is nervous and worried in situations that do not threaten him with anything. If an individual has such a tendency, then one should imagine the most favorable scenario for the development of events and think in a positive direction. So a person will be able to make sure that nothing threatens his life and safety, and he will be able to cope with the rest of the troubles, if they arise, on his own, because in a truly critical situation, the internal reserves of the body mobilize themselves. This is a protective function of the body, so there is no need to be afraid of what has not happened yet, since it is the far-fetched inner anxiety that is an obstacle to peace.
There are various ways to stay calm, and one of them involves thinking of a contingency plan in case of failure. Most likely, it will not be needed, but the realization that there is a way out gives a feeling of calm and confidence. And if failure overtakes, then you should immediately begin to act on the backup version of the strategic plan.
How to remain calm in a conflict situation, which are not uncommon in a person's life. The individual now and then faces rudeness, injustice and irritation of the surrounding people and it is very difficult to remain calm in these cases. Often you want to pay back with the same coin, but it would be better to refrain, so as not to complicate the situation. Responding to the negative, the individual will receive only a new portion of anger and aggression, and his life will be even more filled with disappointment and anger. In the end, everyone will lose from this. Learning to control yourself in such situations is difficult, but it is necessary. For this, no matter how difficult it is, it is important to always be in a good mood.
- you should try not to dramatize life situations, and not give in to the impulse to exaggerate the negative;
- you need to use in your vocabulary as often as possible the words "I'm stronger than this", "I can handle it", "It's okay"; such verbal formulations will help to look at the existing problem in a different way;
- before sharing a problem with someone, you need to think and not tell it to all your friends; you should digest it yourself in order to calm down; well-meaning friends may show more sympathy than necessary, which can further upset;
- you should mentally visualize your calmness (become a calm and calm person in your imagination);
- you need to determine for yourself those factors that make a person lose self-control and control over himself. Knowing personal stimuli and avoiding them will help a person stay calm throughout the day;
- it is important to learn to control your emotions, for this you should remember the moments when a person could remain calm in a difficult situation;
- you can not respond to attacks in a state of irritation, it is better to remain silent until calmness comes;
- in any situation, always look for something positive;
- having heard criticism addressed to him, a person should find a rational grain in it; if it is difficult, then you need to ignore what they say;
- it is necessary to develop a positive attitude towards people;
- it should be remembered that the negative emotions that have engulfed are harmful, first of all, to the person himself, therefore, if a mistake is made, this should be recognized;
- to calm yourself, you need to listen to audiobooks that tune in to a positive perception of life;
- if there is such a person who can support the individual, then you should talk to him;
- viewing quotes from books can help set a person up for positive behavior;
- troubles in life should be treated as training, the more successes an individual achieves in life, the more negative situations he overcomes;
- a person cannot be liked by everyone, no one can do it, so it would be better to let go of relationships with some people in the past. Thus, you can get rid of a heavy burden and communicate more with those who influence a person positively;
- to create an atmosphere of calm, you can use calm music or silence, scented candles;
- a few deep breaths can help the individual relieve tension, excitement and adjust to a calmer rhythm;
- observance of the daily routine, a balanced fortified diet will allow a person to be healthy, and therefore maintain inner peace;
- avoiding excessive consumption of caffeine and sugar, maintaining the necessary water balance, you can maintain a calm state of the body;
- daily physical activity will relieve stress, which will allow you to control your feelings;
- meditation, yoga can help to find peace of mind;
- in order not to think about the same thing, you need to get carried away with something interesting or creative;
— it is important to be able to relax and, if necessary, take a day off to be filled with fresh ideas;
- breathing with the diaphragm - the stomach will help to quickly relieve tension and allow you to calm down in a matter of minutes. While breathing with the belly, the belly rises and falls. It is necessary to inhale through the nose, then hold your breath for a few seconds and exhale slowly.
So, why is it important to learn to remain calm? So that impatience and anger do not exhaust the soul and heart. In order to have time to do more in life, communicate better and live a more purposeful and productive life.
If the conflict has already flared up, in this case, composure will not hurt. According to psychologists, it is the extra emotionality of partners that leads to a break in relations. Indeed, in the process of clarifying the relationship, loving people move away from each other, and since our people do not like to go to psychologists, this leads to the dissolution of marriages. In order to always find common ground with your loved one, psychologists recommend restraining your emotions and remaining calm.Among the most common reasons for family scandals, psychologists identified infidelity, disagreements in raising children, and relationships with relatives and friends.
If the couple decided to resolve the conflict on their own, then experts recommend learning how to calmly argue their point of view and try not to lose close contact with the partner. It is in the distance from each other and overly emotional scenes of showdown that the reason for the collapse of the union of two loving people lies.
The average couple tries to resort to the help of professional psychologists as little as possible. Indeed, for the majority, the very fact of contacting a specialist already indicates the end of the relationship.
Do we respond appropriately to insults and swearing? At any work, misunderstandings with colleagues, conflict situations with management are possible. Not to mention the sphere of everyday life, which is crammed with stressful situations. Is it possible to maintain peace of mind in a conflict environment? Psychologists say that it is possible if applied assertiveness.
An assertive person is psychologically stable and independent of other people's opinions.
Instructions: how to remain calm during a quarrel or conflict
- Oriental sages, famous for their measured attitude to life, advise at the moment of conflict not to instinctively clench your fists, but, on the contrary, to straighten your fingers. This simple movement helps with the outflow of blood from the head and makes it possible to instantly cool down and assess the situation calmly, as if from the outside.
- If you are deliberately provoked into a conflict, do not give in. To begin with, do not look the interlocutor in the eye, break eye contact with him, through which he could manipulate you on a subconscious level. In no case do not raise your voice: on the contrary, if you are being yelled at, answer deliberately quietly, but clearly. This confuses the enemy, makes him shut up in order to listen to what you are talking about.
- In cases where you go to a meeting or event where it will be difficult to remain calm (this could be a party with your ex, or a corporate party with competitors), take care of your mood in advance. In critical cases, you can drink a sedative, just do not overdo it so as not to experience drowsiness. But it's best to just remind yourself of the basic rules of equanimity: regular breathing, a smile on your face.
What is meant by assertiveness?
The English word "assert" means - to assert. From this word came the psychological concept of "assertiveness" - such an internal state in which a person has his own, independent opinion, but at the same time he is independent of external pressure, from external assessments. There are three scales of response to conflict, negative events: aggressiveness - assertiveness - passivity. Moreover, assertiveness is in the middle, as the most correct and calm state.
Faced with negativity, a person most often has two main reactions: aggressiveness - to respond with swearing for swearing, anger for anger, as a result - conflict, spoiled mood, frayed nerves, bad relationships, in extreme cases - there are worse consequences. The second response option: passivity - when a person runs away from a dangerous conflict. This can be expressed in passive silence, inaction, leaving the room where the conflict flares up, avoiding negative situations or a negative person for you. This option is non-aggressive, but it brings spiritual devastation, dissatisfaction with oneself, humiliation.
But there is a third option for responding to negativity - assertiveness. Various sages of antiquity have always adhered to this "golden mean", the most correct option for responding to conflict situations.
assertive state- this is an autonomous state, the ability to have one's own opinion, and not aggressive, in need of upholding, like a fighting cock, but a calm, analytical assessment of current events or people. Being in an assertive state, it is difficult to put pressure on a person, it is difficult to manipulate him. Such a person is internally, psychologically stable, he is independent of other people's assessments, from outside opinions, from standard frameworks.
Assertiveness is somewhat detached - it allows you to look at the negative situation from the outside, and, moreover, not indifferently or coldly, but as if you are looking at the stage from the theater hall, but at the same time you are not just a spectator, but an arbiter who must give his opinion about the created situations, their decision, to give an internal assessment of what is happening. But it is important not to impose an internal assessment of what is happening on others, not to dictate your will and not to prove your opinion as the only correct one.
Assertive personality traits
It is important to develop assertive skill:
Quickly deal with a negative situation;
Analyze it;
Develop your own position regarding it and all participants - why it arose, who is the instigator, what are the true and external causes of its occurrence, what the consequences may be and what can be done in such a situation;
Do not violate other people's psychological boundaries - do not attack, do not insult, do not scold;
To be able to protect one's own psychological boundaries - to remain calm and balanced, not to take insults personally, not to be offended, not to let someone else's anger deep into one's soul.
Confucius said: "No one can be humiliated until they feel humiliated". Russian folk wisdom says: "They carry water on the offended". This is the stereotypical thinking of the last century - that one must respond with an insult for an insult, with a blow for a blow, and that if you do not answer, then you are a coward, and you cannot "allow you to wipe your feet on yourself", etc. Self-esteem does not consist in an aggressive retaliatory strike, but in a calm, wise and balanced reaction to any negative. Among the monkeys in the herd, the true leader is not the one who behaves most defiantly and yells and bullies the most, but the one who sits a little further away, somewhat detached, he is the calmest, and it is he who solves all conflicts.
Applying Assertiveness
"When a stick is thrown, the lion looks at the one who threw the stick, and the dog looks at the stick itself. There is a huge difference between them." So is assertiveness - understanding the conflict, look at who and why threw the stick and react to it correctly. Assertiveness can help in the following areas:
Resolution of any conflict situations, both in a work environment and in a domestic or home environment;
Understand your internal disagreements;
Learn to perform a variety of, even unpleasant, work, to overcome time pressure - without stress and panic;
Improve your professionalism at work;
Ability to establish and maintain relationships with different clients;
Do not lose an aggressive client;
Develop self-esteem.
Let's look at some practical examples of assertiveness. It is worth bearing in mind that people are often vengeful, even in small things. Sometimes it manifests itself at a very deep subconscious level. How can this be overcome? A paradoxical response: positive to negative. For example, in the office, you have to approach an employee and, after showing him a poorly done job, ask him to redo it. The reaction of the employee may be:
1) aggressive - indignation "I did everything well", "they find fault with me", "redo it yourself";
2) passive - dismissive throwing the folder on the table, "okay, I'll do it later", detached silence.
In any case, you will hear impartial remarks addressed to you: if you are on an equal footing and colleagues, then right in your face, if you are a leader, then behind your back. It is rare that someone will show the right reaction and calmly ask: "What exactly needs to be redone? What mistakes have I made?" and then say, "OK, I'll redo it."
What can you do with assertiveness? First, understand why this employee did such a poor job: tired, sick, something is not right at home, he is incompetent, he is tired of his work, it's time for a vacation, etc. Your reaction depends on what answer you get. But in any case, you can manifest something positive and unexpected. For example: "I understand that you are tired of everything and you are tired, I also have such a mood, but it would be better if we try and redo the work", warmly thank the employee "thank you, you know that I like horror films" , and your report was from this series", etc. An unexpected, and even with a sense of humor, answer can neutralize vindictiveness. It can also help to involve in joint work, in a joint discussion: "let's see together how we can fix this situation", "first we all calm down, have a cup of coffee, and then think about what we can do," etc.
In any case, it is important to show calmness, understanding and tolerance. Especially, this applies to especially aggressive situations in which emotions rage over the edge and the arguments of the mind are powerless until the person calms down. There are trainings for assertiveness, various techniques that you can learn. But the most important thing is an internal position, thought out and developed, which will allow you to maintain balance in any life situation and not destroy the psychological boundaries of other people.
Stay calm in stressful situations
Anything can piss you off: both serious problems and even the most insignificant trifles. There is nothing wrong with giving vent to emotions, but in some cases it is still better to refrain and calm down. Especially if the emotions are negative.
There are some simple ways to help you quickly pull yourself together and calm down.
1. Sit down, relax, restore your breath. Close your eyes and for 30 seconds imagine cool white water falling like a waterfall on the top of your head and slowly running down from your head to your toes. Then imagine how all the water slowly flows down to the floor in a funnel. Imagine everything in detail. Then take a deep breath and open your eyes.
2. Moisten your hands with cool water and touch your neck (first with one hand, then with two). Gently, in a circular motion, for 30 seconds, rub the neck and shoulders, gradually increasing the force of pressing the fingers. Then, within 30 seconds, reduce the pressing force to a light touch. Then rinse your neck with cool water.
3. Take a thick towel. Squeeze it well in your hands and twist it with all your might, as if squeezing it. Clench your teeth, close your eyes tightly and strain all the muscles of the body as much as possible (especially in the neck and arms). After 25-30 seconds, abruptly drop the towel on the floor and relax your muscles.
Using these simple exercises, you can quickly recover and calm down both before an important event and after an unpleasant quarrel. Most importantly, remember that there are very few things in the world that are really worth the nerves you spent.
In the modern world, there is nothing easier than getting into all sorts of stressful situations. Sometimes it seems that you could easily perform in the circus with the number "Crazy Squirrel in a Wheel." You combine personal life with work or study, you do not always communicate with pleasant people, you are tormented by personal and financial issues, unfulfilled obligations and unresolved problems. One division separates you from the boiling point. Stress creates chaos in your mind, under the influence of emotions you can quickly lose control. That is why it is important to have a plan that will allow you to quickly pull yourself together and find inner balance in moments when life kindly rewards you with a heavy kick in the ass.
1. Determine the cause
You can be annoyed because of the minibus driver who cut you off very unsuccessfully, after the boss arranged a head-washing, a girlfriend had passionate sex with your brain early in the morning - a bad mood can originate from absolutely any area of your life. And the sooner you understand the reason, the more effectively and easily you can get even with it.
2. Find the answer
If you cannot control the source of your stress, then you are quite capable of taking control of your thoughts. Once you have determined the cause of the issue that is eating you, you will have several options for solving the problem: think about how it is more expedient to act, try to immediately resolve the situation, or continue to be angry and inactive. But that's the way for pathetic losers, and we know for a fact that you're not one of them.
Make an answer plan, just like in school:
- Is your past a source of stress?
Remember that the past no longer exists in your present reality and you cannot change it. Regardless of what happened before, you need to realize that you are living here and now. And the essence of life, in principle, lies in this moment - "here and now." The past is in the past, the future cannot be predicted. So does it make sense to waste your emotions on something that is absolutely beyond your control?
- How does the source of stress affect you?
Can the opinion of one person who considers you an asshole surpass the other nine who find your company pleasant and educational? Or how is your work colleague screwed up on all the swings able to ruin a delicious dinner in the company of your girlfriend? Put filters in your mind, do not let small squabbles and failures affect the things that occupy a truly important place in your life.
- How much do you control the situation?
It is necessary to give an honest answer to yourself: are you really unable to influence the course of events or do you not want to do this, justifying your cowardice and weakness with a fatal combination of circumstances? Indeed, there are things that are beyond our control, but you, as a worthy representative of Homo sapiens, are able to change your attitude to a negative situation that you cannot influence in any way. How do they say? If life slipped a lemon - gobble it up with tequila.
3. Focus on your breath
Simple, but incredibly effective breathing exercises are a kind of first aid for a head inflamed from irritation, where devastation reigns. Deep focused breathing will help you come to your senses, improve your mood a little and bring you back to the present moment from the chaos that is raging in your mind.
Try it yourself:
- Exhale completely through your mouth. Try to breathe using the diaphragm as much as possible (this is the dome-shaped muscle that separates the abdominal cavity from the lungs).
- Exhale through your nose. Count to four.
- Hold your breath while counting to seven.
- Exhale completely through your mouth.
Repeat the cycle three more times.
4. Get distracted
Here are some simple ideas to help your brain get some rest:
- Play games;
Video games, board games, card games, tic-tac-toe - use whatever is available!
- Think of something unexpected;
Count how many gray objects are around you, remember how many names you know with the letter “G”, what films with Anthony Hopkins you have seen ...
- Warm up;
Pull up, squat, stretch your arms and neck, distract yourself from the emotional physical manipulation.
- Listen to music;
Play your favorite album from your favorite band at high volume: something fun that can uplift the spirit and free the mind.
5. Express gratitude
Think about what you are grateful for in this life (both in general and in particular), starting with global things: healthy parents who love you, despite the fact that you called them the last time two weeks ago, or a cookie that They gave it to you for free at your favorite coffee shop. These practices improve mood by reducing levels of cortisol, the stress hormone. The study found that people who practiced it daily experienced improvements in mood and physical well-being. Alternatively, thank our magazine for such articles designed to motivate you and at least teach you something.
6. Avoid the question "What if?"
A stressful situation can develop in a variety of directions and flow into anything. Therefore, it is necessary to solve problems as they come, because the more you scroll through the conceivable and unthinkable plot options in your head, the longer you will not be able to pull yourself together and concentrate. Don't beat yourself up, don't add fuel to the fire. Don't make yourself worry more than you are now.
7. Focus on the positive
Consciously select the happiest memories from your memory arsenal and start scrolling through them in your head. An excellent practice that can show that everything is not so bad, and there are those in the world who love you.
8. Move more
Now is the time to head to the gym: 40 minutes of intense training can improve your mood at times. Jogging, walking in the fresh air, rollerblading or cycling is a very good substitute for alcohol, in which you sometimes consider your main antidepressant.
9. Stock up on vitamin D
Vitamin D is found in many foods, such as fish, eggs, and fish oils. But the most important source is the sun, your free sedative. Open the blinds in your room. Let the rays of the sun, perhaps they can break through the clouds of your gloomy mood.
10. Take a time out
Walking in the park, reading a book, watching a series or an interesting movie while eating pizza - give yourself a break that will be able to distract your tired brains.
11. Spend time with friends
You need the company of cheerful and cheerful people where you can relax, talk or even get advice that will help you deal with the problem effectively.
12. Laugh
Genuine laughter can instantly lift your spirits, lower blood pressure, reduce stress, and even boost your immune system. If there is nothing funny around you, the Internet will help you. Moreover, the body is not Stanislavsky, it does not distinguish the difference between fake or real laughter. Try to master the villainous laugh, and you will feel how the tension melts away in a matter of minutes.
13. Let off steam
You can scream like crazy, beat all the pillows in the apartment or a punching bag. Free yourself from the anger that overwhelms you.
14. Hug
Hugs are known to give us an instant rush of endorphins. If you didn't know, it's a chemical that makes us happy and content. Hugs are another proven way to quickly calm down and reduce stress levels.
15. Chew gum
Research shows that chewing gum can reduce the levels of stress hormones in the body. The act of re-chewing increases the production of serotonin, which can also improve mood.
16. Eat dark chocolate
Good dark chocolate is based on a high proportion of cocoa, which contains a large amount of phenylethylamine, which causes a feeling of mild euphoria.
17. Take a nap. Or sleep
Sleep is very important for emotional and mental health. It recharges batteries, leaving your head clear and calm. Even 20 minutes of pleasant naps can do wonders for your mood.
18. Don't replay unpleasant conversations in your head.
After an unpleasant conversation, you still scroll through the dialogue in your head and think: “Damn, I should have said that, answered that. And he would have told me so, and I would have answered so. Then everything would be all right.” Familiar story? You are able to become your biggest enemy and critic, who deprives you of sleep and peace. Change direction. You should always be on your side and not dig your own grave with such internal monologues.
19. Let go of the situation
Forgiveness is able to rid you of the negativity caused by any person. This does not mean that you have accepted the situation or agree with it.
This means that you will not harm yourself with feelings and anger that corrodes from the inside because someone did not live up to your expectations or did you a trick. Learn to quickly process any negative thoughts and feelings, draw conclusions and let go of these emotions in order to move on with a light heart and a clear head.
20. Consider perspectives
Stress and anxiety feed our own distorted perception of the situation. So before you start biting your nails and tearing your hair, put the whole picture in perspective.
List specific things that are actually going wrong. Many people, having written down everything point by point, visually, directly from their heads on paper that will endure everything, find that the problems put at the forefront can be easily and quickly solved. Think about what advice you would give if a friend or family member were in a similar situation. This makes finding a solution much easier.
Ask yourself: "What is the worst thing that could happen?" Having thought through even the most unpleasant situation to the smallest detail, which most likely will not come, you can mentally prepare yourself for any possible surprise.
21. Ask for help
If you are drowning and suffocating in the quagmire of your problems, do not hesitate to seek help from a specially trained person, that is, a psychologist.
How to stay calm under pressure? How to remain cool, calm and not nervous in stressful, conflict and any other critical situations? A quarrel with a loved one, a traffic jam on the way to work, a conflict with the boss, a child's tantrum, a colleague's disrespectful attitude, a queue at the supermarket, etc. Often we find ourselves in difficult situations in which it is quite difficult to remain calm. Surely you are familiar with this state, when emotions go off scale, nerves are at the limit and you are completely unable to make a reasonable decision. It is even possible that someone pissed you off so much that you could only scream and vent your anger at the person who made you so angry.In this article, psychologist Mairena Vasquez shares with you 10 tips and techniques to stay calm and calm in any situation.
Keeping calm
In our frantic pace of life, it is very important to remain calm in order to make the right decisions. A lot of people live in stress because we have to study, work, support a home and family, earn money, solve various family and other problems ...
Neuropsychological
Sometimes so many problems pile up at once that it seems to us that everything is very bad, and we catch ourselves thinking: “Well, why am I doing this?”. Under such circumstances, it is extremely important to learn to control yourself. Let's talk more about what this means.
Remaining calm is the ability to remain calm in any situation, not to lose patience and optimism, especially in circumstances in which we feel we have no control over what happens.
Tension, nervousness and all the negative consequences associated with them accumulate in our body and can cause various health problems.
That is why it is vital to master the techniques of staying calm in order to best cope with any difficult situation.
Why Calm Matters: 10 Ways to Keep Calm
10 ways to keep calm and equanimity in any situation
What are the ways and methods to achieve peace of mind? How we are able to act in stressful or conflict situations is key. Of course, it is very difficult to remain calm if we are irritated or someone pisses us off. Therefore we will give you 10 tips on how to learn to remain calm.
When we are nervous or upset, our body sends us various signals: pulse quickens, temperature rises, voice becomes louder, muscles tense... At such moments, remember these tips, perhaps they will help you adequately cope with the situation:
1. Identify alarms
First of all, learn to pay attention to the signals that your body sends in situations of tension and stress. It is important to be able to determine how your body reacts in such circumstances. so that you can then take control of yourself.
If you can change the situation, do it for your own peace of mind. If you are able to control your thoughts, you are halfway to victory..
How to keep calm? Believe in yourself and your ability to achieve your goals. Remember that even after the darkest night comes the dawn. Primarily, don't panic. No matter how difficult and stressful the situation is, it will not last forever, and you can overcome it.
Some people start drinking coffee or grab a cigarette to calm down, thinking it will help. However, this is an erroneous opinion.
Another mistake is the absorption of large quantities of flour and sweets, as well as adding a large amount of sugar to food.
Not only coffee, but any other drink containing caffeine makes us even more nervous. Sugar-containing foods also do the opposite of what we want: instead of calming us down, they give us energy, so we can feel even more energized.
So, what food will help you find peace and not be nervous?
Experts recommend in such cases dark chocolate and foods rich in vitamin C: strawberries, oranges etc. as they help to reduce the level of cortisol (stress hormone), as well as various relaxing drinks (for example, valerian or linden tea).
Those who, to calm down, begin to “pounce” on the refrigerator, chewing gum recommended (sugar free) This will help you calm down and reduce stress. Try chewing slowly, consciously, enjoying the taste: your attention will be focused on the chewing gum and help you take your mind off the problem.
7. Nature is your ally
In difficult and tense moments, it is very important to “move away” from the situation, not only mentally, but also physically. Find a quiet place where you feel comfortable and at ease, and think of anything other than what is causing you anxiety.
If you have the opportunity to go to nature - do it! Forest, mountains, beach - everything that is available to you. Nature will help you relax.
8. Importance of exercise
How to become calm and keep cool in any situation? Move, be active! Walks are highly recommended. Depending on your fitness, you can simply go for a walk or go for a run - this is a great way to "unplug" from problems, release accumulated energy and clear your mind.
It doesn't matter what exercise you do, but even a short walk is always much better than being locked up at home alone with your thoughts. Physical activity helps to manage emotions and release endorphins, which makes us happy.
If you don't like running and prefer something else, you can find any other alternative - swimming, dancing, Pilates, yoga or - all of these activities help relieve accumulated tension and stress.
Exercise helps manage emotions and stay calm
9. Forgive, forget and keep a sense of humor
Sometimes we are faced with situations in which, for various reasons, we feel guilty and very worried about it.
In such cases, in order to remain calm, it is important to realize the mistakes made, to try to forgive yourself in order to get rid of this feeling of guilt. If we are sure that we have made a mistake, we need to be able to forgive ourselves and give ourselves another chance.
Try to see the positive side of things and approach the situation with a sense of humor. Laugh at yourself, over the circumstances, even if it seems difficult to you!
10. Congratulate and cheer yourself up!
We all know that keeping calm and equanimity in any situation is not an easy task. It requires patience, practice, desire and willpower - all these qualities will not let you feel defeated even when it is very difficult and everything seems to be out of control.
Congratulate yourself on what you have achieved! You did! You have shown yourself to be a mature person, able to manage your emotions and actions. Be proud of yourself! Even if you made a mistake in something, it’s not scary, don’t punish yourself - next time you can do better! In addition, mistakes allow you to know yourself, and if a similar situation occurs in the future, you will no longer repeat them.
"Magia es creer en ti mismo".
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