The dangers of co-sleeping with an infant. Pros and cons of co-sleeping with a newborn. Co-sleeping with a child: up to what age

Finally, the long-awaited day of discharge from the hospital arrived. Happy parents watch a tiny baby snoring in a cozy crib, not suspecting that this idyll will not last long. Several nights will pass and, tired of getting up regularly, the mother will leave the baby nearby, and then he will completely “move” closer to his parents. Is this good or bad?

A couple of decades ago, pediatricians were categorical: the baby should sleep separately. The statement was justified by the risk of suffocation of a newborn and unsanitary conditions - an adult bed is full of microorganisms dangerous to fragile immunity.

Now the opinion of experts has changed. Modern doctors We are sure that the benefits of sleeping together with your child are priceless. Maternal closeness promotes harmonious development, has a beneficial effect on the nervous system, and stabilizes lactation. In women, postpartum adaptation occurs faster.

Many families act based on the needs of the baby himself - when he is calm, he is placed separately until the next feeding. This gives parents the opportunity to relax.

Co-sleeping in the first year of life

Opponents of family holidays argue that babies do not get enough sleep with their parents. But deep sleep in the crib rather caused stressful situation, provoked by the absence of an adult. The constant presence of the mother actively stimulates work respiratory center newborn

Sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) is much less common among babies who sleep with a loved one.

Co-sleeping between 0-3 months

Maternal attachment to the baby occurs during pregnancy. It remains long after childbirth. Both need to feel closeness, and a night's rest together for the first three months fulfills this need. However, before you move your baby to your place, you should weigh the pros and cons of sleeping together with your child.

Pros of co-sleeping with your baby:

1. Stabilization of lactation. Feeding on demand at night promotes milk production.
2. Women's mental health.
3. Stabilization of the newborn's breathing.
4. Young children often wake up during the night. A woman has to constantly get up, which prevents her from recuperating.

Minuses:

1. The baby will quickly get used to sleeping in an adult's bed. These inconveniences can be avoided if he sleeps without his mother during the day.

Baby 3-6 months: should he be put to bed separately?

Having crossed the three-month mark, the baby becomes more active. Now he doesn't sleep all the time, he can roll over, and many toddlers try to crawl. Leaving him alone on the bed is dangerous, so a crib will be useful for daytime rest. If your baby cannot fall asleep on his own or cries for a long time, give him some time. Attention to children's needs is one of the main contributions to their harmonious development.

Benefits of co-sleeping for up to six months:

1. comfortable night feeding;
2. attachment formation;
3. rare awakenings at night.

Disadvantages of a child sleeping in an adult bed:

1. Unsafe if the child is already crawling;
2. For intimate meetings between spouses, you will have to choose another place.

Co-sleeping with a baby aged 6-12 months

The baby is growing, night feedings occur more out of habit, and not from hunger. Mom's breasts serve as a good sedative, antidepressant, and a means of falling asleep. It is impossible to explain to a sleepy baby that breastfeeding every hour and a half is no longer necessary. After six months, the baby's diet will be varied with complementary foods. During this period, co-sleeping with a child becomes uncomfortable. How to wean a baby - main question, who stands in front of the parents.

Children's holidays in parent's bed after six months. Advantages:

1. way to support breastfeeding as long as possible;
2. the opportunity for a quiet rest for the mother;
3. the baby falls asleep faster;
4. feeling of security.

Minuses:

1. frequent awakenings at night;
2. a baby can climb over a sleeping parent or fall out of bed.

Objective pros and cons of co-sleeping

The work of the famous American pediatrician Benjamin Spock had a great influence on the opinion of children's doctors. His 1946 book, The Child and Its Care, was a huge success. Experts around the world unconditionally agreed with B. Spock's judgments, accepting them as undeniable truths.

Spock states: “From birth to six months, the baby should sleep separately, but in the parents' bedroom. After six months he can be moved to a nursery.” The doctor warns about the possibility of harming the child, unhygienic conditions, violation intimate life parents.

Modern psychologists insist: sleeping together has a beneficial effect on the newborn. The likelihood of pinching a baby is reduced to zero if he sleeps on his mother’s side.

And it’s never too late to teach your toddler to sleep in a crib. He's sure to love his cozy little nest when he's ready. Up to what age is it appropriate to co-sleep with a child? As the child approaches two years of age, he begins to show individuality and value his own space. During this period, he is mentally ready to sleep separately.

Arguments for co-sleeping

Nowadays, parents approach any issue related to education more consciously. The undeniable “truths” of the past are being questioned; more and more married couples are supportive of having a baby in their bed.

The following are in favor of this decision:

• supporting lactation in women;
• breastfeeding “on demand” without having to get up every time;
• common biorhythms between the newborn and the mother;
• reduced risk of sudden infant mortality;
• the child does not experience stress, and in the future does not suffer from insomnia or nightmares;
• maternal warmth - best medicine from “colic”, pain in the gums during teething, anxiety, childhood fears.

Arguments against co-sleeping

• feeding on demand at night leads to overeating;
• a woman cannot fully rest because she is forced to monitor the child’s safety all night;
• fear of harming the baby;
• obstacle to intimate relationships between spouses;
• unhygienic (according to some pediatricians, an adult’s bed is a source of bacteria dangerous to a child’s fragile immune system).

Each family is free to independently decide whether co-sleeping with a child is acceptable and until what month. The main thing is that the interests of all its members are taken into account. If parents decide to sleep together, you should take care of the comfort and convenience of everyone.

How to organize co-sleeping?

Staying with the mother all the time is natural and comfortable for the newborn. But a woman will need from several nights to a month to learn to rest next to a tiny baby, sleep on one side all the time, and feed without getting up.

The success of co-sleeping largely depends on a woman’s ability to feed her baby while lying down. Women with small breasts do not have problems. For lucky owners above size 4, it is better to seek advice from a breastfeeding specialist.

What to consider when organizing co-sleeping:

• the presence of a hard orthopedic mattress;
• regular change of bed linen;
• special for child sleeping bag or a diaper under the head;
• the baby’s place is between the mother and the wall or protective edge;
• Parents' pillows and blankets should be located away from the child's face;
• intimate marital meetings are moved to another territory.

Safety regulations

Even if from the first days of life a newborn sleeps with his mother, he must have a crib. You can leave him in it during the day, especially when he has already learned to roll over and crawl. A separate bed is a solution for parents whose children toss and turn too actively. The front cover is removed from it, and the cradle itself is placed next to the adult bed.

When one or both parents are in a state alcohol intoxication, under the influence of sleeping pills, others sedatives, are sick infectious diseases, sleeping together is strictly prohibited. It is safer for the baby to spend the night separately.

If a woman cannot fully rest when a baby is nearby, it is more advisable to transfer him to a crib after falling asleep.

Children's pediatrician, the first assistant to many parents, Evgeny Olegovich Komarovsky, is rather against co-sleeping with a child. In this matter, the doctor advocates reasonable flexibility. In his opinion, each child is individual, just like any family. Therefore, if it is more convenient for mother and baby to sleep together, and dad is not against it, resting together will only be beneficial.

The doctor notes that children staying in their spouse's bed at night often causes divorce in many families. Returning from the maternity hospital, a woman completely devotes herself to the child, but not every man is able to endure this. The matrimonial bed remains the only place, where the husband can claim the care of his wife, so the presence of the baby causes extreme dissatisfaction.

How to wean a child from co-sleeping?

Komarovsky notes deep maternal affection. It is natural for mother and baby to be together around the clock. But such a connection limits the interests of the mother herself. Her lifestyle is completely adjusted to the child, and her own needs fade into the background. The first months may suit this state of affairs, but soon the woman will feel the restriction of freedom. This may cause nervous disorder, depression.

According to Evgeniy Olegovich, keeping a baby in the parent’s bed has more disadvantages than advantages. What is the cost of one excommunication, which sooner or later will have to be resorted to. The child will quickly get used to sleeping in an adult bed, but you should not flatter yourself with the hope that he will ever want to leave it. More often, co-sleeping is practiced in single-parent families, when the mother raises the baby alone or the parents sleep separately.

“If a baby is placed separately from birth, he will quickly adapt, which means parents will not have to rack their brains about how to wean him from sleeping together,” says Komarovsky. A well-fed, dry baby sleeps well until the next feeding in a ventilated room.

Age at which a baby can share a bed with parents

By about one and a half years, the need for mother's milk is reduced to a minimum; the child eats “adult” food during the day. The breast becomes larger as a “sedative” or a way to put the fidget to sleep. When the baby stops waking up at night to drink his mother’s milk, this is a signal that it’s time to move to the crib. Now the task of parents is how to wean their baby from co-sleeping?

The separation of the crumbs should be carried out gradually, without categorical prohibitions and notations. Don’t be intimidated by the dark, old jokes, or other horror stories. Explain to your baby that adult children sleep separately, tell a story, sit with him until he falls asleep. If a child often wakes up at night and cries bitterly, do not be categorical, take him with you. Gradually, the nightly hysterics will stop, and the baby will know that his mother is friendly and understands his fears.

When to stop sleeping separately:

• adaptation to kindergarten;
• illness, teething;
• changing of the living place;
• divorce, quarrel between parents;
• the birth of a brother or sister.

If such situations happened after the parents set out to wean the child from co-sleeping, you need to be prepared that he will again ask to return. It’s better to give in and let the baby stay with his mother for some time. You should not leave him alone with his experiences, fears or pain.

Note to mom

For the first three months of life, a child’s time together with his parents is natural. breast-feeding. Postpartum period often called “gestation” - a newborn needs to feel his mother’s warmth and hear her heartbeat. But soon the baby will begin to explore the world, become inquisitive and active. Development occurs quickly: now he is already turning over on his tummy, carefully studying the toy, and reaching for it with his hand.

When children's leisure time is organized correctly, both parents pay enough attention to the baby, talk to him, help him explore the world, the little one falls asleep calmly and can sleep alone for several hours.

Note to moms:

The breast is not the only way to soothe your baby. Try to figure out the reason for the crying and neutralize the problem. If something hurts a child or he requires attention, it is wiser to relieve the pain using other means, hold him in your arms, and talk. Spend enough time on fine and gross motor skills, teach your baby to music, sing nursery rhymes, and do exercises. This approach will ensure harmonious development.

When is the best time to stop co-sleeping?

• smoking of one or both parents (according to the Ministry of Health, parental smoking can trigger SIDS);
• alcohol consumption;
• taking medications that affect memory or cause deep sleep;
• excessive fatigue, malaise;
• apnea syndrome;
• prematurity;
• there is underweight for medical reasons.

List of used literature:

• Giedd JN, Rapoport JL; Rapoport (September 2010). “Structural MRI of pediatric brain development: what have we learned and where are we going?” Neuron
• Poulin-Dubois D, Brooker I, Chow V; Brooker; Chow (2009). “The developmental origins of naïve psychology in infancy.” Advances in Child Development and Behavior. Advances in Child Development and Behavior.
• Stiles J, Jernigan TL; Jernigan (2010). “The basics of brain development.” Neuropsychology Review

If previously the child slept separately from his parents, now the thesis about the benefits of such sleep is disputed by both psychologists and pediatricians. Tradition is being replaced by co-sleeping, which makes it possible to provide the baby with the best psychological conditions. Its benefits have been confirmed by many doctors.

For example, the famous pediatrician William Sears conducted an experiment on the safety of a newborn's separate sleep. It turned out that without parents, the baby’s breathing and heartbeat problems increase.

Now let's look at this in more detail.

Pros and cons of co-sleeping with a newborn

Co-sleeping– a phenomenon that is little studied for most parents. This raises many questions: is it safe? What exactly does SS provide?

Real advantages

Let's look at the benefits of sleeping with a parent:

Sleeping together brings peace of mind not only to the child, but also to the mother. Such close contact with the child allows you to constantly “feel” him, not be nervous, and eliminate unnecessary worries.

Sleeping together brings peace of mind not only to the child, but also to the mother.

Conditional disadvantages

Opponents of co-sleeping have their own arguments:

The disadvantages of SS are, as a rule, not facts, but lack of awareness.

In order to accurately resolve the issue of sleep organization, you need to study all the information about it. This way, parents will feel more confident and will not doubt the safety of the baby.

Proper organization of co-sleeping

All the disadvantages of SS can be reduced by properly organizing sleep. To do this, you need to follow the recommendations:

• Parents are prohibited from taking alcohol, sleeping pills, and various psychotropic medications;
• The baby should be placed separately if the parents are sick;
• The baby should be full-term and not weakened;
• Swaddling or wrapping a child in blankets is not recommended. All this can cause overheating. The best option– light pajamas;
• The temperature in the room for newborns is 22 degrees, for babies who have reached six months – 18-20 degrees;
• Humidity levels should be maintained. They should be 50-60%;
• It is not recommended to use cosmetics with fragrances or perfumes;
• A child should not sleep in the same bed with pets.

Proper organization of sleep allows you to level out everything possible dangers.

The parent's bed must meet certain requirements:

• A hard mattress with a flat surface to prevent breathing problems in infants;
• Wide bed for comfortable accommodation;
• Regular change of bed linen. It is better if it is cotton, breathable;
• For safety, mother should not wear clothes made of artificial fabrics or with long ties at night;
• A fence needs to be placed on the child's side. For example, you can simply move a crib next to your parents' bed.

Proper organization of sleep allows you to neutralize all possible dangers. It is also important for ensuring the comfort of parents.

How to start correctly, as well as common mistakes of young parents in our article.
How long does a 1 month old newborn baby sleep? This information will help adults organize their day correctly.

Psychoanalyst's opinion about SS

Leading psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott says that without contact with the mother, the baby goes through a terrible experience that can harm its development. The child does not know when contact will be resumed and whether it will happen, which gives rise to severe anxiety and creates a feeling of loneliness.

The newborn is inseparable from the mother, and therefore co-sleeping is an inevitable consequence of this indissolubility.

The baby's sleep is superficial. During it, he feels the presence of his mother, which affects the quality of rest. SS reduces all these risks. Both baby and mother will not feel stressed.

When sleeping separately, the baby often falls into deep sleep to protect itself from stress, which can be dangerous. If there is a change in breathing, cold or overheating, the baby will not call for help.

In this video, a mother shares her experience of co-sleeping with her baby:

Sleeping together has a whole range of beneficial effects. It allows the baby to feel safe and protects against stress. The mother will be able to quickly respond to all the needs of the newborn. SS promotes correct mental development. However, it also requires competent organization. Parents need to take care of both the bed and bedding made from safe materials.

The opinions of Evgeny Komarovsky and his parents regarding co-sleeping differ in various reasons. The pediatrician encourages parents to decide for themselves whether they need to co-sleep with their newborn. In our article you will learn about the advantages and disadvantages of co-sleeping, as well as positions that are comfortable for the mother and comfortable for the child.

Once a baby is born, it requires the constant presence of its mother, so co-sleeping is an ideal solution to help provide the baby with attention. Psychologists have proven that a lack of parental warmth in infancy affects negative behavior in adolescence and adult life. A number of advantages of a child being together with his parents during sleep:

• both parents get enough sleep and feel comfortable, as the mother quickly responds to the baby’s hungry grunts;

Attention! Lack of co-sleeping between mother and newborn is often the reason for disruption of breastfeeding.

Co-sleeping should not be practiced under the following circumstances:

Important! There is no need to be afraid that the baby will get used to the mother’s regular presence. From the age of four, most children express a desire to sleep on their own and no longer require the presence of their parents.

If in infancy the baby slept separately, most likely, being in school age, he will often sleep with adults.

You should not be afraid that the mother may crush the child with her body. Such cases are rare and are more often associated with a number of negative factors.

How to organize co-sleeping with a newborn?

By and large, there are no big problems with the child and his parents sleeping together in the first weeks of life, especially for mothers with older children. For new mothers, we recommend using the recommendations from Dr. Komarovsky, and then everyone will feel comfortable.

Is it dangerous to sleep with a baby? At first glance, sleeping with a baby may seem unfavorable. But we can say with confidence that if adults sleep peacefully without sudden movements, nothing bad will happen. When parents still fear a tragic event, you can purchase a positioner.

Safe poses

It is important that the positions that parents adhere to do not compromise the child’s comfort. A nursing mother can sleep half sideways, leaning on her shoulder blade. In this case, only the head is on the pillow, and one hand is under the head. This position can be taken on either the right or left side of the child.

Children's humor! - Oh, mom, what fat-bellied legs you have!

When the baby has eaten in the middle of the night, it is better to lay him on his back, once again do not carry or lull him to sleep, of course, unless he is disturbed intestinal colic. In this case, the mother sleeps on her back or on her side, as is convenient for her. At such moments it is very convenient.

Sleeping with a baby during pregnancy

This option is possible. However, if the baby sleeps restlessly, spinning and kicking, it is better to refrain from being with the baby during sleep. Many mothers manage to sleep with their baby throughout their pregnancy.

Attention! Pregnancy is not always a reason to stop co-sleeping with your baby.

Bed requirements

A small child does not need to ensure a soft bed or purchase down pillows and blankets. At this age, due to such irritants, a baby may develop symptoms of suffocation and Quincke's edema. Therefore, in order to organize proper sleep with a baby, use the rules below.

What is required from parents

If parents practice co-sleeping with their child, then they will have to stop smoking and taking medications without a doctor’s prescription, especially mothers. Current furniture for children provides various options, which will serve as an excellent place for a child to sleep. There are special pelenators available for sale. There are cribs with the ability to remove one of the sides.

For parents! If your bed is pushed tightly against the wall, you should not place your baby near it. He may become hypothermic and get sick.

It is recommended to provide comfortable conditions for the child’s sleep in the parents’ room, observing the necessary temperature regime and air humidity. We recommend using the recommendations.

Children say! I saw a striped zebra at the Zoo:
- A horse in a vest.

For general development We invite you to watch the video safe sleep baby.

Dad lovingly chose a crib, grandmother gave the new parents hand-embroidered linen for little pillows and blankets - everyone tried to arrange the bed of the new family member so that he could sleep comfortably and happily there. With trepidation, you laid the baby down where he would spend his first night in his life, but after a while it became clear that he had his own opinion on this matter. The baby wants to sleep with his mother.
Even if the child is healthy and does not experience any particular difficulties in adapting to life in new conditions - digestive problems and nervous system, in his mother’s arms he is both calmer and simpler. A situation familiar to many: a baby who seems to be sound asleep is placed in a crib, but not even half an hour has passed before he is awake again and requires attention. What to do if it is almost impossible to let go of the child - he cries. During the day you can lie down and relax with him, but what to do at night? Should I sleep with my child or separately? Some argue that a child should be taught to have separate rest from the very beginning; others, on the contrary, will argue that sleeping together is The best way get closer. Perhaps there is no definite answer to this question and cannot be. Because, as with everything else related to children, each mother makes a decision individually, having familiarized herself with different opinions and studies before doing so.

We are together

1. The first and very significant “pro” is that you won’t have to wake up and get up many times. Every mother knows that getting up in the middle of the night and walking somewhere to feed the child is very tiring! While sleeping together, you can simply tuck your baby into your chest and sleep safely. This, by the way, also applies to cases with children in custody. artificial feeding. All babies, regardless of whether the mother has milk or not, are determined to sleep together. Look at baby animals, for example. After all, they, like people, do not have obsessive ideas: what should be done, how and why. They simply obey their instincts. Our babies, regardless of the type of feeding, retain the sucking reflex.

3. Famous American pediatricians William and Martha Sears, a married couple who raised eight children, believe that “sharing sleep,” as they call it, is simply necessary for parents and children. A Special attention This is worth paying attention to those whose babies are not growing well and gaining weight. To solve this problem, doctors recommended putting such children in bed with their mother back in the last century. Pediatric practice also shows that children sleeping with their mother do not have abnormal levels of oxygen in the blood or breathing problems.

4. The hormone prolactin, which is responsible for the amount of milk, is produced mainly at night. Night sucking maintains good lactation.

By the way, among many peoples, co-sleeping is not even discussed. Basically, of course, these are various ethnic groups: Indians, Africans, Hindus, Balinese. Closer to us are the Mongols and Uzbeks. Maybe because they are not spoiled, like Europeans, by the fruits of civilization and are still guided by the instincts inherent in nature. After all, if you think about it, why do children sleeping in their cribs fall asleep hugging plush toys? Yes, because they simply need to rely on someone when falling asleep! Of course, it’s better if it’s mom, but if she’s not there, then at least let it be a toy.

Of course, that's not all positive sides, and every mother can add to this list a couple more reasons why she and her child need to sleep together. For example, the happiness of both when waking up.

Mom, get up!

Now let's look at the disadvantages of co-sleeping. Today he has much fewer opponents. But there are circumstances in which, despite all the obvious benefits of sleeping with a child, it does not bring the desired results or does not justify itself.

1. You quickly get used to good things. Of course, it can be difficult to teach your baby to rest in his crib later. However, by the time parents begin to “move” the baby away from them, many children are already ready for this and move to a separate sleeping area without much protest.
2. Mothers whose babies are bottle-fed, unfortunately, still have to get up at night. You need to prepare a bottle, and sometimes you need to wake up the baby. All we have to do is wait until the baby learns to sleep through the night without snacking.
3. It is better to decide whether you leave the baby with you at night or not as early as possible. If you resort to this remedy after having already tried all other ways to improve his sleep pattern, it will not work.
4. Naturally, when a miracle is snoring nearby, parents have to solve the issue of intimate life somehow differently. From the practice of family psychotherapists, it is known that the presence of a baby in the parents’ bed harms the adults rather than the child. For couples whose relationship suffers after the birth of a child, this is the first question asked at the reception. To feel comfortable and not worry about the baby's reactions, it is best to move marital sex to a separate place, take care of soundproofing and use the time when the baby sleeps the deepest.

There are also worries that are more far-fetched than based on real dangers. You can often hear from mothers: “the child will grow up spoiled and not independent” or “what about the possibility of crushing the baby in his sleep?” A child grows up spoiled if mistakes were made in his upbringing, but not because of co-sleeping. By the way, the same Dr. Spock who strongly recommended separate sleep, by the end of his life, abandoned many of his views on the development of children, including this one. As for the fear of suffocation in a dream, this is also largely a myth. If the mother is not in a state of alcoholic or drug intoxication, then her instincts and reflexes work well. And even in her sleep she is able to respond to the baby’s movements.

Pleasant dreams

As you can see, there really is no answer to the question “sleep with your child together or separately.” Oh, this “mother’s” lot is to always make decisions for herself! It is worth accepting it, having studied all the pros and cons, based on observations of your child - children do not always fit into generally accepted rules. Based on his individual needs and listen to what your heart tells you. Have you decided to sleep together? Then follow these simple rules:

1. Practice basic hygiene. If the baby is still very small, put him in a separate diaper. And if he sleeps in the same underwear as you, change it as often as possible, without using harmful additives when washing.
2. Get rid of odors that prevent your baby from feeling you around. It is advisable not to use products with strong scents. Perfume, eau de toilette, dad's perfume and shaving products, not to mention the heavy tobacco spirit - not the best atmosphere for a calm baby sleep. Another great reason for dad to quit smoking.
3. Children under about two years old do not need pillows. In the first years, their spine is formed and strengthened. When the time will come, the baby will get to the pillow himself. And, of course, a baby blanket or bedspread should only be made from natural, not hot fabrics.
4. Mom’s nightgown should also be made from natural fabric and without buttons: with a large slit to make feeding convenient.
5. If you decide to keep your baby with you when he starts to grow up and out of infancy, keep in mind: children perform an incredible amount of acrobatic tricks in their sleep. There is even a selection of photographs on this topic somewhere on the Internet: a sleeping family was photographed every half hour, and each time the child found himself in different places and in different poses. He crawls, rolls over from his stomach to his back and back to his stomach again, but in the other direction. He sits down and, unfortunately, falls... To avoid falling out of bed, place the child between you and the wall, and cover the places from which escape is possible with pillows or bolsters.
6. We adults have not paid attention to this for a long time, but for a child it is very important correct temperature and air humidity. The correct temperature is 16-18 degrees (yes, it may seem too cold, but sleep is healthier in a cool room) and humidity 50-70%. When a child appears in the family, buying a humidifier is very helpful.

That's probably all. Well, each of us can supplement this with our own experience gained in practice. Have a nice and happy sleep for you and your kids!

Yulia Solnechnaya
Discuss on the forum

Having suffered from constant lack of sleep and worries about her child, the mother takes the baby to her bed. This makes it much easier to feed him and watch him when he sleeps. But the thought that this could be dangerous for the little man does not leave her head. What if she crushes him with her body at night, or even worse - he suffocates in her arms? How real are such fears?

Can a mother harm her child in her sleep?

Many believe that such a situation can only happen to a woman who does not take her motherhood seriously, drinks alcohol, takes sleeping pills, or is not of sound mind. In fact, it turns out that such an opinion is erroneous.

“A similar incident occurred in my life when I was breastfeeding my baby while lying in bed at night, and at some point, unexpectedly for myself, I simply dozed off. My terrible overwork led to this - I needed to keep order at garden plot, do daily chores around the house (washing and ironing children’s clothes, cooking, washing dishes, vacuuming), getting the older child ready for school and preparing homework with him. The heavy breasts, filled with milk, lay with all their weight on my little daughter’s face, and I woke up only because I felt her suffocating. I still remember my state of horror, so I never again fed my baby in a lying position, but only.”

But sleeping with a child in the same bed is very convenient, since usually the mother reacts very sensitively to any movement and sounds of her baby. The baby gives her signals about what is bothering him. this moment and it’s easier for mom to perceive them when he’s nearby.

But what you definitely shouldn’t do is put the baby next to dad. Men are not so sensitive to children, sleep more soundly and can involuntarily touch them in their sleep.

There is an opinion that if a child sleeps with his parents, he can pick up various germs from them. This has no scientific basis, so healthy parents do not have to worry about this; there will be no harm from sleeping together (if mom and dad are healthy, then the child has nothing to catch).

How to properly lay your baby down?

Prepare a place where your baby will sleep. It must be firm without unnecessary things (towels, rollers, etc.). The baby should have a comfortable and spacious place to sleep. Eliminate places of potential danger so that the baby does not get hurt, fall, or suffocate. It is better to be overly cautious than to reproach yourself later for being improvident.

Our bed was located directly next to the wall, so I had to cover the free space with a blanket so that my little daughter could not fall there. Also from the wall in winter time It blows cold, which can lead to colds.

How does a mother sleep next to her baby?

It has been scientifically proven that children subtly sense their mother’s condition, feel her breathing and heart rate. Sleeping together leads to the fact that the child “adapts” to his mother’s body and sleeps next to her much more calmly.

When the baby sleeps next to his mother, she no longer needs to get out of bed all the time to feed him, give him water from a bottle and see if he opens up in his sleep. She only needs to catch in time what the baby needs and do it as needed. This begs the conclusion: Mom sleeps better when baby sleeps with her.

Note to moms!

Hello girls) I didn’t think that the problem of stretch marks would affect me too, and I’ll also write about it))) But there’s nowhere to go, so I’m writing here: How did I get rid of stretch marks after childbirth? I will be very glad if my method helps you too...

One of the most practical options is to place the baby crib so that it is adjacent to the parent's bed. This way, the mother will be able not only to see her child, but also to reach him with her hand in order to straighten the blanket, cover him, stroke him, say a few gentle soothing words (even without leaving the phase deep sleep, half asleep, so to speak), if the baby cries or sleeps restlessly.

Does co-sleeping with a baby affect the parents' relationship?

Many parents do not let their child sleep with them because they fear that this will become a habit and in the future will lead to his reluctance to sleep alone. In my practice, I have become convinced that these fears are not always true.

My husband and I removed some of the bars from our daughter's crib so she could climb up and down on her own when she needed to. Every day, after we went to bed, she climbed out of her crib and came into our bed, after which she settled comfortably between us and fell soundly asleep. I was amazed at how she navigated the apartment in complete darkness, managed not to catch anything or trip anywhere, although she had to walk through the living room and corridor to get to our bedroom.

This behavior of hers did not last long, night visits began to occur less and less often, and after a while we completely forgot about them.

Regarding the closeness between the baby’s parents, while he sleeps next to him, it is safe to say that she practically does not suffer from this. The child does not play any role here. The main reluctance of a woman to enter into such a relationship can be explained by her fatigue, constant voltage and the inability to fully relax and sleep. Although the reason may lie elsewhere.

It is known for certain that during pregnancy and after childbirth, a woman undergoes a restructuring of her entire body, respectively hormonal background also undergoes changes, which usually entail a decrease in libido. For any woman, the process of childbirth is a kind of stress that only time will help you get through. Awareness of her new role in society, a completely different life and the associated hassle, restructuring of the body - all this in no way contributes to a woman’s desire to express herself in intimate relationships. On the contrary, she will have no time for it at all.

Only the husband’s sincere desire to help, as well as his care and patience, will help the young mother quickly cope with all difficulties. Then she will be able to give her love and affection to her husband again.

So, there are a few key points that young parents should remember::

1. Never take your child to sleep in your bed if you have previously drunk alcohol (even a little) or taken any sleep stimulants. You will not be able to control your consciousness, so it is better to protect your baby from possible consequences your inadequate condition.
2. Separate special place on your bed so that the baby sleeps on a hard surface and only in a position on its side or back. Otherwise, the baby may bury his face in the soft mattress and suffocate from lack of air.
3. Free your bed from all kinds of bolsters, unnecessary pillows, and everything that could be dangerous for the child. Check to see if your baby can get into the gap between the bed and the adjacent wall.
4. Don't overdress your baby at night if you plan to share a blanket with him. The heat emanating from your body will affect it throughout the night, so there may be a risk of overheating.
5. Sleeping together with a baby should not bring inconvenience to its parents, much less negatively affect the baby himself.
6. If your baby sleeps well without you, the need for co-sleeping will automatically disappear. Rejoice at this state of affairs and enjoy the current situation; you will have the opportunity to devote more time to your personal relationship with your spouse.

Co-sleeping with your baby is useful not only as a means of strengthening his nervous system and health, but is also important for extending breastfeeding.