Sexual life after childbirth. After curettage you can have sex

For most gynecologist patients, the question of whether sex is possible after cauterization of cervical erosion is closely related to preserving the family, the decision of many psychological problems and complete recovery.

Cervical erosion is diagnosed in most women who are examined by a gynecologist. The disease affects both women who have given birth and women who have not given birth; often the patients are very young girls who are diagnosed with a congenital form of cervical erosion.

The main method of treating the condition modern medicine considers cauterization of the affected area on the cervix in combination with preliminary conservative treatment. In many cases, the therapy process lasts for months, and for a woman this period may be associated with restrictions in the intimate sphere.

Sex as a component of erosion treatment

Rehabilitation after cauterization depends on many factors - the type of treatment chosen, the woman’s condition, and compliance with the doctor’s instructions during the recovery period. The goal of therapy is to return the woman to normal, healthy life, an integral part of which is sex life.

In many cases, successful sexual intercourse after erosion is a means of preserving the relationship of a married couple, improving the woman’s well-being, full recovery women's health.

Sex after cauterization of erosion is needed - this is a body function that a woman needs, a process:

  • normalizing hormonal and psychological background;
  • improves well-being and performance;
  • increasing immune status body.

Some restrictions on sexual technique are not a problem - they only need to be adhered to for a while.

In some of the treated patients, erosion is re-diagnosed. What reasons can be the provocateurs of such a condition and is intimacy one of them?

Erosion - treatment and recovery period

Cervical erosion is a disease whose causes are not fully understood. The widespread nature of the damage to women suggests the complexity of the disorder and a large number of reasons causing the condition. Determining the exact cause (or group of causes) that caused the disease is the main factor successful treatment and the woman’s recovery.

An important factor in recovery is changing a woman’s attitude towards erosion. This symptom, caused by many unidirectional causes, is just the first sign of trouble that you need to pay attention to. Exclusively medical treatment will not help - restoration of health depends on the woman, who must help herself in overcoming psychological problems, and sex is one of the components of psychological rehabilitation.

Among the main factors of the disease, many are associated with intimate conditions or hormonal condition of a woman, which often directly depends on the quality of her sex life. Among them:

  • inflammatory diseases genitourinary tract, the cause of which is most often infections that are acquired through unprotected sexual intercourse - human papillomavirus, toxoplasmosis, chlamydia, and others that have a long course;
  • frequent douching, which disrupts the natural flora of the vagina (most often caused by unprotected sex with different partners or the desire to avoid pregnancy);
  • hormonal disorders (estrogens deficiency), the provocateur of which can be deep psychological reasons associated with unpleasant intimate experiences or unsuccessful personal life;
  • injuries caused by unsuccessful implantation of the intrauterine device;
  • disturbances of the vaginal microflora, which are provoked by frequent changes of sexual partners;
  • lesions of the cervix and vaginal walls, which are caused by medical interventions during abortion and obstetrics;
  • sexual games that use mechanical toys that are inserted into the vagina;
  • hard, rough sexual intercourse that caused mechanical injuries vagina and cervix.

Mechanical injuries caused to the vagina and cervix are classified as true erosion and in many cases provoke inflammatory diseases of the vagina due to associated infection.

The background for the occurrence and development of the disease in most cases is a state of decreased immune defense organism, which is associated with:

  • dysfunction of the thyroid gland;
  • ovarian diseases;
  • exacerbations of chronic diseases;
  • severe viral infections;
  • pregnancy;
  • psychological state of the woman.

TO psychosomatic reasons erosions refer to a state of deep psychological conflict - a woman’s dissatisfaction with her appearance, relationships with men, as a result of which suppression of femininity occurs, violation hormonal levels and immune protection.

It is believed that cervical erosion is provoked by wounded female pride, problems in realizing relationships with men - deep resentment, disappointment, often anger and aggression, key points which is intimate.

Sex after moxibustion

Cauterization is a shock treatment method that forces a woman’s body to change its “program” and begin to restore the multi-layered squamous epithelium vagina. This takes up to 14 days, complete rehabilitation is achieved within 28 days, after which sexual contacts are allowed.


For full recovery women need:

  • remove the psycho-emotional cause of the disease (improve relationships with your husband, abandon frequent changes of partners, deal with grievances and traumas);
  • reduce stress levels;
  • change your lifestyle;
  • regulate weight and nutrition;
  • quit smoking and alcohol;
  • create a positive attitude;
  • change your attitude towards your physical fitness– do physical education, exercise therapy, sports, take a massage course.

For a while recovery period Some restrictions are imposed on the lifestyle - the period during which sexual activity is usually prohibited is up to two months.

Restrictions after cauterization


Activities that may cause blood flow to the pelvic organs and cause bleeding or infection are prohibited. These actions include:

  • performing douching;
  • procedures with hot water– sauna, hot bath;
  • water health treatments;
  • sexual intercourse with dildos;
  • active physical exercise;
  • lifting weights.

Restrictions on sexual contacts are intended to:

  • protect the open wound surface from infection;
  • protect her cauterization area from mechanical damage weak layer of epithelium;
  • remove the possibility of bleeding.

A regimen of careful treatment of the affected area is imposed by the attending physician. Its duration depends on the size of the erosion, the condition of the scab, psychological and physical condition women.

A woman's need for sex


Sometimes a woman has strength various reasons does not understand that it is intimacy that is the cause of her illness and is extremely necessary for successful recovery and prevention. The following signs indicate this:

  • constant irritation without highlighting a specific object;
  • low immunity and the state of a “constantly ill person”;
  • a condition in which pain is felt all the time in some part of the body;
  • decreased memory and intelligence;
  • unsuccessful attempts to lose weight, despite diets and exercise;
  • the appearance of wrinkles, loose and inelastic skin;
  • chronic sleep disorder.


Regular full-fledged sex with one partner can normalize the condition - it has been proven that it promotes emotional relaxation due to the production of endorphins, increases immunity (the number of antibodies in a person who regularly has sex is 30% higher); increases production female hormone estrogen, which reduces pain and normalizes menstruation; increases collagen production; replaces 15 minutes of intense physical training.

When can you have sex after moxibustion?

If everything is fine with your partner, when can you start traditional sex? This question interests many women.


The period when you cannot be sexually active is determined by the method in which cauterization was performed:

  • after radio wave treatment, which causes the least trauma to the cervix, the strengthening of a new layer of epithelium in the normal psychophysiological state of a woman takes 30-45 days - after the end of this period, sex is mandatory;
  • freezing creates a fairly large affected area; gynecologists recommend sexual rest with this method for a period of 45 days;
  • chemical destruction according to instructions, does not require a period of abstinence. After cauterizing the erosion, you can have sex in a few days, but gynecologists still recommend a certain period of sexual abstinence;
  • Electric cauterization is the most traumatic and painful method. Pain after cauterization will prevent a woman from having sex for up to 45 days, but the actual period of infection with new epithelium can last up to 60 days.

A full sexual life after treatment of erosion should begin after a follow-up visit to the doctor. In the case of treatment of sexually transmitted infections, before cauterization, the doctor must examine both partners, and control tests must confirm the absence of infection.

Why do most gynecologists prohibit sex after moxibustion, even if there is no discharge and the woman feels fine? These are the consequences of traditional misconceptions, according to which a woman does not need sexual intercourse and the desire to protect the woman from injuries to the mucous membrane.

Many doctors allow you to have sex after cauterizing the erosion after the scab has come off. The main condition is that he must be careful, protected and not hurt the woman.

Women who practice hard or rough sex as a couple should give it up - otherwise the pathology may recur. Is it possible to have sex in non-traditional form? These types of sex are allowed as long as they do not cause pain or bleeding.

Is it possible to have anal sex after cauterization of erosion and how many days after treatment is this permissible - a question that is rarely asked to a gynecologist.


Technically, anal sex does not injure the lining of the cervix, but during orgasm it can cause bleeding. Another risk factor may be the entry into the vagina, in which the normal microbiological environment is disrupted, of opportunistic flora from the rectum during intercourse.

But the possibility of such intimate contacts is often discussed on forums, and many women confirm that careful and protected sex of this kind with a regular partner helps relieve tension in a man and strengthens the couple’s emotional relationship. Optimal time the beginning of possible sexual relations - 10-15 days after cauterization in the absence of pain and discharge.

Oral sex is one of the safest, from the point of view of erosion, contacts - there is no penetration into the vagina during intercourse, trauma to the mucous membrane and penetration of infectious agents. The guideline for this type of sex will be solely the woman’s well-being and the absence of bleeding.

If intimate relationships are impossible, masturbation will help relieve tension. A woman should do it without irritating the vagina - this will prevent infection and injury to the cervical mucosa.

More information can be obtained on thematic forums, where women share their experiences on the topic “after cauterization of erosion, when can you sleep with your husband.” Feedback from participants reflects the relevance of the problem:

Anna, 32 years old, asks whether orgasm after cauterization harms erosion (my husband and I couldn’t resist), and whether this will affect healing. The answers say that orgasm itself is not dangerous, but penetration into the vagina can disrupt the epithelium that has not yet strengthened.

It must be taken into account that the birth of a child independently and through caesarean section have some features in influencing subsequent sex life .

When is it possible?

All the hardships of childbirth are behind us, and now that mother and baby are already at home, it is necessary to establish a normal life in which an important place belongs not only to the child, but also to his parents.

If a woman had no problems during childbirth, medical recommendations for starting sexual activity are as follows: in 6-8 weeks After childbirth, you can begin to have a sexual life, provided that she has stopped.

TO postpartum hemorrhage should be treated calmly. If you follow your doctor's recommendations for taking medications to restore your health, it will stop on its own.

If it stopped, and after sexual contact it resumed again, this is a reason to visit a gynecologist.

We talked about a case where a woman gave birth on her own without ruptures and frequent episiotomy procedures (cutting the perineum). If you had to endure the most unpleasant suturing procedures, from the beginning sex life, you may have to wait until they are completely healed. Visit a doctor who, during the examination, will definitely tell you how things are going.

Very important is attention to one's own feelings. You, like no one else, feel best what is happening inside. Because if painful sensations Yes, it’s better to explain this to your loved one.

Women often worry and about dryness in the vagina, in which sexual life can turn into torture. The hormone estrogen, or rather its deficiency, is “responsible” for this state of affairs. Don't worry - its level will return to normal.

The way out of this situation is quite simple. There's quite a lot in stores now large selection of intimate lubricant gels, among which it is worth choosing a warming one. They are harmless, and their action will help you relax and enjoy communicating with your loved one.

Also an excellent action that stimulates additional production of natural lubrication is active petting. Ask a man to give you an erotic massage, do not disdain aphrodisiacs in the form of incense.

Pose for intimate life after childbirth they have some restrictions, which, however, you can set yourself. As some women point out, after giving birth it is difficult for them to perform “acrobatic tricks”, so you can start with the missionary position or the “man from behind” position. This minimizes the load on weakened abdominal and thigh muscles.

But be mindful of your feelings.: The pressure on different vaginal walls is different in different positions, and try to choose one that does not cause pain.

Sex life after caesarean section

A week after natural birth many women are already ready to move mountains, and those who survived a caesarean section still walk, bent over and holding on to the wall.

Abdominal surgery, which is what it is, makes you think about anything, but not about sex. However, gynecologists also exhibit abstinence period is approximately 6-8 weeks. During this period, the bleeding should completely stop and the stitch should heal.

There are some nuances with the onset of sexual activity after childbirth, as reported by women who have undergone surgery.

In principle, they are familiar with all the same problems - dryness, muscle flaccidity, pain “like the first time”. But because of the incision in the peritoneum and uterine area, it is more difficult for them to find a comfortable position for making love.

In some ways, they were lucky that the vagina did not suffer stretching during childbirth, but even women who gave birth themselves do not confirm the myth that the birth canal expanded to an immense size.

But cesarean does not leave injuries on the walls of the tract, which significantly reduces the period of abstinence. Also useful for training and contracting the vaginal muscles.

Regarding poses: for such women, it is best to recommend those where the man actively moves without putting pressure on the stomach. But the position when the woman is on top will be initially unpleasant due to the need to move the lower back and hips. This can cause the seam area to become very sore.

There is another delicate problem that women face after surgical delivery: orgasm is too painful. If any remain, It's better to wait a little with intimate life so as not to cause bleeding.

Let's talk about contraception methods

Not all couples dream of similar children, and this fear often prevents a woman who has recently given birth from being sexually active. It is worth saying that diversity contraceptives There are many suitable even for nursing mothers.

Usually, most common method– barrier. On the one hand, it’s safer to use a condom, but on the other hand, many men and women complain about discomfort after using it. You may also be surprised to discover that they appeared precisely after childbirth.

Don't worry, they exist now hormonal drugs, applicable even during the lactation period. Your doctor will definitely tell you which ones are right for you and how to work out a schedule for taking them. Feel free to use them, overcome the fear that it won’t “work.”

It is also possible to install a spiral, but many doctors indicate that this is only possible after five months after birth. You should not wait this long if you want to resume sexual activity after childbirth as soon as possible.

And here You shouldn’t believe the well-known myth that breastfeeding prevents pregnancy, as well as trust and traditional methods interrupted sexual intercourse.

As he says medical practice, a woman is able to conceive within a month after giving birth. Yes, the hormone prolactin, produced during constant and frequent feeding, prevents pregnancy for some time, but as soon as its level drops even a little (they began to feed less often, supplementary feeding was introduced), its effect stops.

Women who feel the best when it comes to choosing contraception various reasons introduced artificial nutrition for children. They may well choose hormonal contraceptives, applicable for any woman.

Psychological aspects

Even if you are physiologically completely ready to resume your intimate life, your fears and self-doubt may still prevent you from enjoying it. In this regard, the help and support of your loved one is very important.

As a rule, women cite their own unattractiveness as the first reason for refusing sex. Sagging belly, shapeless breasts, excess weight- all this does not contribute to the desire to show your husband without clothes.

Don't panic, this will go away, you just have to take care of yourself a little, actively involving his father in caring for the child. Then you will have time to go to fitness, get a mask or pedicure.

Also, many note that they simply do not want to have sex after childbirth. In this case, we can advise you to try to put yourself in a romantic mood: make time for a date with your husband, watch romance films, or something more frank. Over time, the desire will return to you.

As you can see, restoration of sexual activity after childbirth requires some effort and time, but it will definitely lead to the fact that you will again enjoy communication with your loved one.

A caesarean section performed as a result of the impossibility of natural childbirth involves cutting abdominal cavity and an incision on the uterus. This surgical intervention affects the woman’s genitals, so they require a certain period of recovery.

Wounds heal slowly, external and internal seams They often bleed and cause discomfort and pain. In this regard, sexual activity after a caesarean section is not immediately possible. The body must be given enough time for complete rehabilitation to avoid infection and rupture of the sutures. This may take weeks and even months - in terms of timing, the recovery interval after surgery is very individual.

Some women believe that sexual activity after a cesarean section can only begin six months later, when the body has completely returned to normal, so they are in no hurry to do so. Others, on the contrary, eagerly want to experience all the joys of sex again and give in to their husband’s persuasion too early. Ideally, a golden mean is needed here: there are medical recommendations that determine when, after a CS, intimate life can be resumed.

  1. It takes 6 to 8 weeks after a cesarean section. It is at the end of this period that the couple can and should gradually return to their marital responsibilities and sex life.
  2. 6-8 weeks is a very conditional period, since one female body will recover after a cesarean section already in the 4th week after the operation, and for another even 8 weeks will not be enough. Therefore, a young mother should be attentive to own health both physiologically and psychoemotionally.
  3. Doctors say that you can start sexual activity after a cesarean section if you have finished postpartum lochia(bloody) and no problems with stitches.
  4. To make sure of the latter, you must undergo an ultrasound to know what condition the stitches are in and whether having sex can cause them to separate. After the examination, the doctor will professionally advise whether you need to wait a little longer with this matter or you can already please your husband with the long-awaited news.
  5. Think about whether you are psychologically ready to resume sexual activity? If you feel attracted to your man again and want it, then the time has come and there is nothing to be afraid of.

The question of when it is possible to be sexually active after a cesarean section is decided individually in each individual case. 6-8 weeks is a conditional period that can only be used as a guide. Doctor after thorough examination can tell you for sure whether the time has come or whether you should wait a little longer. Moreover, it can only take into account the physiological preparedness of the body, while an equally important role here is played by the woman’s psychological mood.

A little about the timing. According to statistics, about 10% of women, after a 4-week period after a cesarean section, are already fully recovered and ready for sexual activity from a physiological point of view. Another 10% of mothers do not have time to rehabilitate even by 8 weeks after birth due to complications and individual characteristics. The remaining 80% falls within the interval from 6 to 8 weeks.

Physiology

In order for intimate life after a cesarean section to be enjoyable and not lead to complications (festering, infection, suture dehiscence, etc.), you need to listen sensitively to the body and know whether it is ready to return to sexual relations or not. Some useful tips will help young couples resume full-fledged sex without harming the woman’s health.

  1. Wait until postpartum lochia ends before you start having sex.
  2. After this, undergo an ultrasound. The doctor must give an opinion that their sexual life is satisfactory and does not threaten their discrepancy.
  3. Consider the issue of contraception so that sexual life after cesarean does not soon end in another pregnancy. During the lactation period, most birth control pills Contraindicated for a young mother. Intrauterine device It will be possible to place it only six months after the caesarean section. You will have to choose between a condom and vaginal suppositories (suppositories, tablets, ointments, etc.).
  4. A man must understand that all his movements during sex should be as careful, smooth, and gentle as possible, so as not to damage only the recently healed surface. Deep penetration, roughness, harshness, pressure in the first months of sexual life are excluded.
  5. For six months, enjoy only classic positions that exclude deep penetration.
  6. During the first intimate intimacy that occurs after surgery, a young woman may feel discomfort and even pain, but they are natural, so there is no need to feel complex or worry about it. Tissues, ligaments, muscles - everything should stretch and tone. Give your body a little time - and soon it will return to normal.
  7. Some impatient couples, trying to resume sexual activity as quickly as possible, despite a caesarean section, try to replace classical forms of sex with others. It is unacceptable. Firstly, any penetration (even with fingers or tongue) into the vagina ahead of time is fraught with infection. Secondly, a female orgasm, if it is too violent, can provoke tension in the pelvic organs, and the seams will come apart.

So have sex when you're done rehabilitation period after cesarean you need to be extremely careful, in accordance with these recommendations and the doctor’s permission. Sex is strictly prohibited in the presence of genital infections and inflammation in both partners, lingering lochia and bleeding sutures.

In addition to all this, the couple must understand that by the time of the first sexual intercourse after a cesarean section, the man must also undergo examination and be absolutely healthy. Sometimes psycho-emotional factors interfere with the resumption of full sexual activity.

Scientific fact. As scientists have found, during breastfeeding a woman releases hormones that are similar in action to the hormones produced by the body during sex. This is what explains the decrease in libido and the reluctance to resume sexual activity (most often this happens just after a cesarean section).

Psychological moments

Often, the onset of sexual activity after cesarean section is complicated not by physiological difficulties and problems. It seems like the lochia has stopped, and the stitches have healed, and the doctor gave permission, but something is constantly getting in the way. Moreover, both spouses often do not understand what is happening. Because of this, the relationship in a couple can be upset. And the reason in most cases lies in the psychological discomfort that a woman experiences after a caesarean section. Therefore, she will have to work on herself and restore peace of mind, on which sexual attraction to a partner and the intimate life of a couple largely depend. How to do it?

Complexes about appearance

Very often, after a cesarean section, young mothers feel embarrassed about the stitches and stretch marks on their bodies. And if the matter becomes even more complicated overweight with manifestations of cellulite, then internal complexes develop at cosmic speed. At the same time, this is not possible due to surgery; diets are contraindicated due to lactation. All this results in the refusal of sex to the beloved man.

If there is such a problem with sex life, it needs to be solved with the help of a psychologist. After all, your husband probably loves you not only for beautiful body? Moreover, you will soon be able to start playing sports and will quickly return to normal.

Love for a child

Sometimes a woman’s maternal instinct is so strongly developed that with the birth of her baby, she practically forgets about the existence of her husband. She gives all her care, affection, and love to the new family member. It is quite understandable that in such a situation, even after the rehabilitation period after a cesarean section, the spouse is in no hurry to resume sexual activity. It's time to stop and think: are you really ready to become a single mother? After all, no man can stand it long absence sex.

Chronic fatigue syndrome

After a cesarean section, a young mother is advised to get plenty of rest in order to recover after the operation. In fact, she has to take care of the child and at the same time continue to run the house. Cooking, cleaning, washing, shopping, feeding, walking, children's consultations - all this falls on the fragile shoulders of a woman.

And now it seems that the postpartum discharge has already gone away, stopped, there are no problems with the suture, and there has been no sexual activity. And it's not even about physical fatigue, but in moral. To want intimacy again, you need to relax, buy yourself beautiful erotic lingerie, have a romantic dinner by candlelight at home - all this will help you get in the right frame of mind.

To restore sexual activity after a cesarean section, patience and attention are required from both spouses. The absence of health problems and complications after childbirth is only half the solution to the problem. It is necessary for a woman to feel comfortable psycho-emotionally. If her husband makes her feel that she is loved as before and even more, there will hardly be any difficulties with sexual attraction.

The resumption of sexual activity after the birth of the baby has an individual time frame for each couple. Usually, the gynecologist sets a certain period of abstinence for the new mother during a routine examination. His term depends on the woman's health, characteristics of childbirth and other nuances.

Every young mother is concerned with the question: how long can you not have sex after childbirth? We answer: if the birth of a child occurred without complications, you can return to intimate life a month and a half after giving birth.

This is caused by the need to restore the uterus and heal the placenta attachment site. Infection in an open wound can lead to inflammation of the uterus, so you should wait until the damaged tissues heal.

The vaginal dimensions should also come into shape. Immediately after birth, it is in a stretched state and gradually contracts to its previous size. To speed up this process, many gynecologists recommend performing special exercises, which train the muscles of the vagina and perineum. During the examination, the gynecologist will see have the woman’s organs returned to normal? or further abstinence from sexual activity is recommended.

After childbirth, the vagina is susceptible to infection. Therefore, it is worth using high-quality contraception and maintaining hygiene. This will help avoid postpartum complications.

Remember: by deciding to have sex a week after giving birth, you are risking your own health!

If it happened surgery in the form of curettage of the uterine cavity, the period of abstinence increases at least two months. In some cases, the duration of restriction of sexual activity should be increased by the time necessary for full recovery birth canal young mother.

Seams and tears

Sex life is affected various complications that occurred during childbirth.

For example, after an episiotomy (tearing the perineum and subsequent suturing), a woman needs longer recovery period, during which she will need to give up sex.

In the female genital area there are many nerves, the sensitivity of which is damaged when the perineum is ruptured. Because of this, nerve endings can become pinched, causing discomfort when resuming sexual relations. When sutures are placed, a change in the configuration of the vagina may occur, which will cause pain in the woman in certain positions.

Painful sensations will pass over time, because the sensitivity of nerve endings has the ability to adapt to new conditions. At first a man should be especially neat during sexual intercourse, so that it is not painful and unpleasant for the partner.

IN postpartum period because of the seams skin in the perineal area and the entrance to the vagina become more sensitive.

Pressure on the sutures, which is inevitable during sexual intercourse, can cause pain and a lack of natural lubrication in the woman. To reduce pain, you can soften the suture area by using ointments that heal keloid scars.

Features of sex after caesarean section

The duration of abstinence from sex after childbirth by cesarean section does not differ from the period of abstinence after normal childbirth and is four to six weeks.

The uterine scar will take approximately this amount of time to heal, unless any complications arise.

In most cases, a abdominal scar from a cesarean section heals faster than a uterine scar. However, since it is not the main indicator of muscle recovery, the speed of its healing is not taken into account when recommendations regarding the resumption of sexual activity.

Women who have had a C-section have a slightly easier time having sex after giving birth because their genitals have not been altered.

Since the vaginal walls and cervix remain the same as before pregnancy, there will be no problem of loss of sensation.

Types of intimacy

Almost every married couple experiences changes in their sex life after the birth of a child. At first, partners adapt to new sensations and must find best option intercourse that will suit both of them.

Oral sex After childbirth, you can resume much earlier than other types of sex. This will allow the woman and man to receive release without having to engage in penetrative sex.

During the first time after childbirth, there may be difficulties with vaginal sex for various reasons. Lack of lubrication, a woman's fear of pain, changes in sensitivity - all this can affect the desire for sex. Using high-quality lubricant, choice correct posture and a slow pace will help you cope with problems and regain your former sexual activity.

As for anal sex, it also should be abandoned for the time after childbirth. This is especially true for women who have suffered perineal ruptures during childbirth, hemorrhoids or anal fissures.

Even in the absence of contraindications, a young mother should know that during anal sex the uterus is stimulated back wall. This can lead to uterine bleeding.

Unpleasant symptoms: what should you pay attention to?

Every woman after childbirth should listen to her feelings during sex, not only to get pleasure, but also to prevent problems.

For example, pain during intercourse can be both physiological and psychological. In the presence of strong pain you should postpone sex and start looking for the cause of the discomfort.

Presence of blood during sex it can frighten partners and to find out the reason, a woman should immediately see a gynecologist.

Bloody discharge can be caused by both lochia residue and healing scars after ruptures. If the bleeding is severe, you should not delay your visit to the doctor and call an ambulance.

When deciding to disturb sexual peace, a woman needs to take into account not only the recommendations of her doctor, but also her own readiness for sexual life. Psychological condition a young mother should be stable. Only then is quality sex possible, which will bring pleasure to both partners.

Watch the video on how to return to bed with your husband after childbirth:

When can I start?

There are no strict age or physiological limits. You can start when a person is ready for it. Readiness is implied psychological and informational. Psychologically, you must want this, and want it precisely with this person, right now, precisely in the conditions available today, want it of your own free will, without feeling any sacrifice on your part. Informationally, you must know in detail the features of female and male anatomy, physiology, methods of protection against pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections, methods emergency contraception in case of unforeseen circumstances, have the coordinates of a doctor whom you can turn to for help at any time and not be afraid that he will not take you seriously, scold you and tell your parents everything. You should not only know in theory about contraceptive methods, but also have contraceptives with you and be able to use them, and also accept the principle for yourself for life? take care of yourself. Your protection? is this your personal business, and not the business of your partner, even if he is more experienced and promises to take care of everything for you and you trust him in everything? Don’t let anyone be responsible for your life and health except yourself? NO ONE else can cope with such a burden, but pay for it? only for you and your unborn child. You should forget about the so-called forever. calendar method, calculation of safe days, interrupted sexual intercourse and safe sexual activity during menstruation. Are these all myths, worthy of only one? to be forgotten forever. You should also know about methods for diagnosing pregnancy on early and ways of interrupting it are real, not mythical. Should you exclude such sources of pseudo-medical information as advice and experience from friends, mother or partner, Internet forums, articles in popular magazines, films? all this is an exchange of myths and rumors between amateurs; reliable information can only come from professional sources. You should have a place where you can meet safely without fear and where hygiene products are available. You must have money to buy contraceptives and pay for doctor visits and possible treatment. You should think through in detail the issue of relations with your parents on this topic: what and when will you tell them so as not to live in constant fear? they will find out/kill you and don’t lie.

The first time will be remembered for a lifetime. Not only conscious memory, but also unconsciously? this is the first experience that the organism encounters, and it writes it down on a white sheet of paper as an example, with which all others are then compared. The first time can determine your ideas about the norm for the rest of your life, it’s like New Year? As you meet, can you spend it? Therefore, try to make it perfect, do not let random impulses spoil future happiness.

You must love and feel loved. You shouldn't fight and force yourself. And you have to ask yourself a hundred times? WHY do you want this.. and whether you want it. You must be confident and feel worthy. If you hesitate? It means it's not time yet. And it doesn’t matter how old you are.

When NOT to start:

Blackmail. ?If you like? prove it?. Has love never been proven in bed? and does not require proof at all, is it? a way of life, not a set of actions-evidence. If you think that your love needs to be proven, then you don’t believe in it yourself. Are you a free person and do not have to prove anything to anyone? Are you who you are? and the other one can pretend, but not become. And if someone is not happy with this, then it will continue to be unsatisfactory, and you will never be free with this person. If you succumb to blackmail and prove it, will you simply voluntarily allow yourself to be used? And this is what will make you feel bad in the first place? from the fact that they themselves allowed themselves to lose their dignity and betray their love - and there is even no one to blame.

Victim. ?I want to give him the most precious thing so that he understands how much I love him?. This is the same as the first option, only an even more perverted idea of ​​love. Love has nothing to do with sacrifice? This is a feeling that only free people are capable of, ready to recognize and respect freedom in others. Is that why he doesn't insist? he respects your freedom and waits for you to be ready and make your free choice, without sacrifice, yourself, without shifting responsibility onto him. Appreciate his nobility and be worthy of your partner. Take responsibility? do things without sacrificing for the sake of someone, but because you want it yourself. What if you don't want to? don't commit. Understand that he will not be happy from your sacrifices, after which disappointment, regret and reproaches of ingratitude will certainly come. Do not humiliate your love with evidence, wait until you are ready.

If you consider the Beginning to be proof of your love, its necessary criterion, its pledge, your duty towards your loved one, an exam for your devotion, a sacrifice expected of you on the altar of love, and other similar thoughts hovering in your head? Would you wait any longer? but are you expected to provide some kind of material support for your words? wait! You're not ready yet.

Age. ?It is time?. This argument is not worthy of lengthy discussion. Readiness does not depend on calendar age. Why did you preserve yourself until such a venerable age, as you now consider? To have the same doubts as before? still go against yourself? Are you doing this to tick off some critical year? You're not a little girl anymore if you're so worried about age, are you? does that mean you already have the ability to imagine? and what will happen then, after this desperate step? Something will really change in better side? Or for you later long nights communicate with your inner voice and make excuses? If you are doing this because you are “so many years old” and still have something missing in your life? learn to love. With this skill will come true readiness and a worthy object.

Self-affirmation. “I’m already an adult, what about this?” the main occupation of adults?. Typical childhood trait? imitate adults without understanding the essence of their actions. Try on mom’s shoes, even though they’re terribly uncomfortable to walk in? Why does she wear this? Because she’s an adult. Make up? but now you can’t touch your eyes, you can’t go out in the rain, and in general your face has become so sloppy - why is she doing this? Because adults all wear makeup, that’s how it’s supposed to be. Say?adults? words, although you yourself want to cover your ears? Try smoking, drinking, then suffer, then overcome your disgust and continue? and why am I worse than adults? And let me feel bad, and let me be ridiculous in my childhood attempts to imitate, and let me not really want all this at all. But that's how it's supposed to be. A teenager must rebel and do everything out of spite. Should he be different from a child? adults should finally see what a teenager is? This is NOT a CHILD, but an adult. Do adults see a typical childish trait? try everything that is unknown and copy them in your own way adult behavior. They have always been touched by this trait, they are still touched by it in the back of their minds, because in the first place, of course? their concern for your health, just like in childhood when you played with glass and fire. But besides these experiences, are there any remaining thoughts? it’s not - “how did he grow up?”, but? what else is he like? funny child, what did I think? Is he already an adult? Like this. Keep this in mind just in case you do something to prove your worth. Wealth, independence, freedom, self-respect, responsibility? All these are signs of an adult, independent of his calendar age. And like all true values, they do not require proof, they are obvious! And if it seems to you that others do not recognize them as you? It means they just don’t exist yet! Don’t ruin your life by inventing evidence - engage in self-improvement, this will prove to everyone that you are mature much faster.

And don't forget yet? adults do have more rights. But they also bear much more responsibility. And they dream of being free from it, at least for a little while, and having the opportunity, as in childhood, to shift responsibility onto someone else. For someone else to deal with the consequences of their mistakes. Unfortunately, in sexual life each person sorts out his mistakes himself? Mom will be glad to transfer all your suffering to herself, but she won’t be able to! Treat infections for you, perform abortion for you, treat infertility after abortion for you. Are you old enough and ready for such challenges? Or maybe it’s worth waiting with such self-affirmation and returning to the good old antics like provocative hairstyles and loud music? Let it be only touching and not tragic? proof of your growing up :)

Curiosity. ?They talk so much about this? Should I finally try it? Also a childhood classic. Try how a fire burns, try how a toy breaks, try how a pencil draws? try drugs, try sex. They talk so much! I want it too. Don't like it? I won't? Is this just a test? once.

You know? curiosity? This is generally a trait inherent in all living things. This is the basis of learning and gaining experience. Is this a wonderful quality when it is properly satisfied? first at the expense of other people's experience! Everyone knows the saying that a fool learns from his mistakes, but what about a smart person? on strangers. Let now you do not trust specific adults who surround you and despise them personal experience. But there are books! Humanity has described its entire experience in books more than once! Why not just once? Yes, because they also did not trust the experience of previous generations :); But there must come a time when the next inexperienced one will be smarter than the previous ones? and not just read, but BELIEVE the experience of mankind. Will he believe that the drug is different from a regular substance and that it causes addiction? Sometimes? the first time, and will it appeal to you the first time? unknown, so rely on the experience of your friend? it is forbidden. Will believe that it is easy to get pregnant and get infected from the first bad time, and sex becomes the best pleasure in the world only when a person is ready for it!

I receive letters EVERY DAY with the following content: ?I tried it. I didn't feel anything good. Why are they talking about this so much? What am I doing wrong?? Maybe someone will take this experience into account? the experience of your peers and contemporaries! I can assure you that if you are not ready yet? Your curiosity will not be satisfied. You will remain in the dark, moreover? In disappointment, will you blame yourself and your partner, you may lose faith in yourself and decide that you will not be able to experience this pleasure at all? remember the importance of first experience? Can the body remember it as normal? and give out these sensations all subsequent times? In general, if you really want to find out what it is, read books about love, watch films, develop yourself as a person and learn to love. And you will find out everything in due time? but only Small child may be offended by such a phrase, but the older a person is, the more often he repeats it? for a reason. But because it comes to him!

Fear of standing out. ?In our classroom/yard/institute? EVERYONE is already walking and talking! Only me?? This is a famous joke. And you tell me too! :)) If you really want to be like everyone else? It's a classic sign of immaturity, but it really does have its way out. An adult, of course, will simply skip this point, because it does not concern him. The basis of his adulthood is this? that he is not afraid to be different from everyone else. He doesn’t deliberately want to stand out with a nose ring. This is a remedy for those who have nothing else to stand out, may those who want to be offended by this forgive me. Isn't it intentional not to be like everyone else? for this is also unfreedom! Should we simply not be afraid in some situations, when there is a choice between personal freedom and someone’s established dogmas? choose your freedom. It is important here not to confuse dogmas (such as the beginning of sexual activity before a certain age) with norms (such as the beginning of sexual activity with a condom). The rules were invented for the safety of people! Dogmas have no rational explanation. This is how they differ.

How to prepare

Get acquainted with basics anatomy And physiology female and male reproductive systems. Find out what all this is called correctly, what it looks like, how it works, what is true and what is a myth. There are many books and articles and even educational films about this. Don't trust information received from friends.

Explore your menstrual cycle . Mark the days when menstruation begins and calculate the length of the cycle. To understand later? delay or not. Shouldn’t you immediately be alarmed if your cycle is still irregular? this may be an age-related variant of the norm. Don't draw your own conclusions? If something bothers you, a doctor should sort it out. Don't try to calculate dangerous and safe days using your charts? they don’t exist; you can get pregnant on any day of the cycle, even during menstruation. If someone you know got sick while they were using protection? this?method? ? This is a happy accident for them, which may not be so happy for you.

To prevent the condom from falling off and didn’t break during the process, it must be of high quality (from well-known companies: Durex, Lifestile, Playboy, Contex, Preventor, Innotex, and not cheap Chinese ones), with an unexpired expiration date, purchased at a pharmacy. Young people reading this paragraph should also remember that some girls, wanting to get pregnant, pierce the packaging - and check the integrity of the packaging themselves, and best of all? use the ones you buy yourself. What to do if this is true:((

You also need to be able to put on a condom correctly: they all have a reservoir for sperm at the tip, so it is necessary that there is no air in the condom (and in this reservoir in particular). It is when there is air inside that the pressure increases during movement and the latex breaks. In order not to leave air inside, before putting it on (before rolling it out), you need to tightly clamp the reservoir, releasing the air from it, and then put it on the erect penis, again pressing tightly and all the time squeezing any possible air down, out of the condom?out into the street? . This is a certain skill that there is no shame in learning alone on a cucumber or banana.

During anal sex, some anatomical features, when even expensive condoms break, and also when you know that your partner? a carrier of a serious disease, for example? hepatitis B, or when due to certain circumstances (taking antibiotics, potent drugs, etc.) pregnancy is not only unnecessary, but its occurrence is catastrophic - sometimes it makes sense to put on two condoms at once.

Remove the condom It also needs to be done on time and carefully, otherwise all precautions will be taken in vain if, after removal, the sperm ends up in the vagina.

Remember that pregnancy and infection can result from exposure to sperm in the vagina. Violation of virginity is not necessary for this. Can sperm get from hands, clothes, underwear? during games and affection. The hymen is not a barrier to sperm - there is a hole in it! You can get pregnant during anal sex if sperm gets into the adjacent hole later. Can you get pregnant with interrupted intercourse, in particular? repeated, when the first one was with a condom? because there may be sperm residue on the penis. Can you get pregnant through oral sex, but can you get infections? the same as with normal.

Remember that you have 72 hours after unprotected sexual intercourse for some reason to resort to the so-called. emergency contraception- postinora? but is this just in case of an accident? rape or condom rupture. It's an alternative to abortion, and that's how it should be treated, right? not much more harmless.

Know about the structure and features hymen. Everyone has it. But it is easily stretchable and does not always tear. Very often it just breaks, then there is very little blood the first time, but it appears the second and third time, along with unpleasant sensations? it turns out that every time? like the first one. Don't worry, sooner or later it will end when it finally breaks completely. If bloody issues during intimacy, do they have a source not external, but internal? You need to go for an examination and check the condition of your cervix; with erosion, this phenomenon is quite common. But we have already said that going to the doctor is mandatory in any case after the Beginning. Sometimes the hymen does not even tear, but only stretches. Then there is no blood at all, and you may receive a reproach from your partner for not being a virgin. In the meantime? this is the most common possible situations. The hymen is stretched. Do you feel unpleasant sensations not only for the first time, but also in subsequent ones, especially at the very beginning, which then go away? This is fine! The hole in the hymen remains as it was, so at the beginning it is always unpleasant. But it stretches, and in the process the discomfort goes away, especially if there is enough lubrication. The hymen will most likely break completely during childbirth. How do you understand virginity? it is not a hymen condition. It is possible to maintain anatomical virginity while engaging in sophisticated forms of sex with different people, and vice versa? You can lose your virginity as a result of injury or rape, remaining completely inexperienced for a long time. But what if you are interested in the condition of the hymen? such?virginity? easily restored surgically. Just who are you deceiving in this way? A man also judges your experience not by appearance hymen. And he also knows about operations to restore virginity :)

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